Stupidest Person Alive or SPA

That is me. I am the stupidest person alive.

Here’s the story.

So last night, I spent some time in my room, talkig on the phone to Chris. We had a really good talk, and I explained to him what my plans are for the next few years. Right now, they include staying at Chapman all of this year. Next summer, Chris will move here (Somewhere in Orange County, or a little further, but still within 30-40 minutes). Next year, I will be an RA in either Henley or Pralle, which means that I won’t have to pay for housing, AND I will get my ownroom, so Chris can stay over whenever I want him to. And hopefully with the extra money I can get a car, so I can visit him when I want to as well. That year I MAY study abroad.. but now I’m thinking that I might do that junior year instead and just try to take more major classes next year… that way I can do the RA thing and save money… but if I don’t get the RA job, then I’ll want to go. So I’m sure I’ll just apply for it all. So the year after that I will get an apartment with some people (potentially Chris, but also potentially Matt and Ross or someone) and then keep going to Chapman. I’ll go there until I graduate, start spending the summers here and working…. my plan stops right after graduation where I have no clue what happens next.

So Chris and I talked about that a lot… I asked him if I wanted him to try and move closer to OC if he would. He said if I asked him. So I asked him, “If I stay at Chapman next year, will you move closer to OC?” and he said, “Yes.” So that was really sweet and I was really happy about that and he was really touched as well. It feels good to at least have a semi-plan. Now if only I could declare a fucking major. I apologize in advance for all the swearing that this may contain.
So that was a good talk, and we also talked about how GB (Gap Boy) invited Chris to a party but he didn’t want to go b/c there was going to be underage drinking there.

So we talked about that for a few minutes. Who knew it would end up to be very ironic that we had that talk..

So then we broke and I went down to Natalie’s room to meet up with everyone. I didn’t know that they had any alcohol, but apparently they had a lot. So I had 3 Smirnoffs and 2 shots of something. So after that, everyone was just drinking and we were having a good time. The stuff in between is not important… perhaps it will go in a public entry… foam party, yippity yap, we did lots of random shit, going to the bathroom in the women’s room, and the fat girl that tried to get on me.

So after awhile, I went to change b/c I was all wet from the foam… after that I went to Robin’s room, where Allison and all the gay men were. So we all hung out there, and everything started b/c Asian Alan was drinking and he’s like “I always get red when I drink.” So I related that Margaret Cho part where she’s like “Do you have a sunburn?” “No, I’m fucked up” And he thought that was funny and we talked about how great the Choster is. So then I was like “Yeah I saw her live and I met her” and he’s like “no you didn’t” and I was like “I’ll prove it…” So we went to my room, just the 2 of us and I showed him the pic of Margaret. So we were hanging out and just talking, Chris called and I could tell her was upset with me for being drunk. I told him I would call him tomorrow and then after we got off the phone, I talked Alan’s ear off about Chris. Then Chris called again and asked if I had lied about being drunk any other times. I told him no, we talked for another second or two, and then he was gone again and I felt really bad again. So Alan and I kept talking, then my roommates all came home … Kyle with his girlfriend, Danny with 3 of his HS friends. So they were like “Did you drink?” and I was like “Uhhh…..maybe a little.” So then I was embarassed so me and Alan left. He was like “Let’s hang out in my room” so I’m just like “uhhh ok, but I want to find Allison” and he’s like “We will, don’t worry.” I’m like “ok.” So we went in there… to make a long story short, we were just talking and the next thing I knew he was on top of me and he kissed me. He stopped after a second or two… and I started talking about how wonderful Chris was and how he would send me flowers and when he decorated my car for me, and how absolutely sweet he was the best guy I ever dated. Except in between me talking, Alan kept kissing me. This went on, not for too long. Maybe 15 minutes at tops. He just got off eventually and sat and talked to me. And I felt horrible. Horrible b/c of what just happened, horrible b/c of what I did, horrible b/c of everything. And I felt bad too b/c Alan was like “Would that have happened if you weren’t drunk?” and I said flat out NO. I never would’ve done that. I just want to cry. Thank God Kyle’s in the shower in case I want to.

So that’s what happened. Oh I forgot. In between that, before this I had to pee. So I called Chris while I was in the bathroom and tried to talk to him. He still seemed mad, and I didn’t want him to be.

Flash forward to this morning. I wanted desperately to call Chris. I finally did, around 10 something, and we ended up talking for nearly 3 hours. It was a bad talk. Though I’m more upset b/c Chris said it was the worst conversation he had ever had in his life. That really upset me and I cried as I read it.

So I called him… we at first talked about the whole drunk thing. I got very defensive and was telling him that I don’t need to live by anyone else’s morals except my own. He got mad at that, and told me that if I really cared I would think about what he thought, and that I obviously didn’t care about him enough to stop myself from drinking and all this stuff. It was a sad talk, and it upset me for several reasons. One is that I don’t want to hurt him, but I didnt’ feel like he understood that it was MY life. Two is that it was causing me much added stress which I couldnt’ deal with. And three, I had something that I was much more upset about. So I was sitting there, we were talking, and then there was silence. I started to cry, b/c in my head I was replaying what happened with me and Alan and I was so upset and I was so mad at myself for it happening. And I knew that I had to tell Chris. If I had kept it in, and he found out later (which he invariably would, b/c I wouldn’t be able to keep it in forever) I figured things would be much worse. So I just decided to tell him. I was crying and just said “Someone kissed me.” And he was like “Did you say kiss?” and I was like “yeah” through my tears…. and then I knew that there was going to be a big tear explosion, so I told him to hold on while I went outside by the Henley gym and just started bawling. I explained the entire story to him, and he started crying. I was so upset… still am. I cannot believe I was stupid enough to do something like that to such a great guy. Granted, we are not dating at this point…. but still, we both know that we are both still emotionally attached. So it was just a bad idea… I felt better for telling him.. but I was just so upset and I couldn’t stop crying. He doesn’t deserve this.. he doesn’t deserve someone who would do something like this to him. He should have someone who treats him right. It was so sad, we were both just there, crying and I felt so fucking stupid for what I did. When I was with Alan, I just wanted so badly for it to be Chris, I was seriously imagining that it was Chris when he was kissing me. But it didn’t feel right, I didn’t feel anything. I just wanted my Topher. I wanted him so bad. It isn’t fucking fair.

We kept talking, it seemed to just get worse. I just cried harder and he cried, and I felt worse and worse and worse. How can I do that to someone I love? I don’t fucking know. This entry is horrible.. I can’t even explain how terrible I feel for doing this. The good part was that Chris said he would be able to forgive me as soon as I forgave myself. I don’t know when that will be… I plan on feeling guilty for awhile. But I was so happy that he said he would forgive me. He said that if it happens again, then that is it for us. Honestly, a random hook up that I only do b/c I’m horny is not worth losing the greatest guy I’ve ever met. Nothing is fucking worth it. He kept saying that everything would be alright. I hope it is. I really do. I didn’t want to do this to him, I didn’t ever want to make him feel this way. I didn’t want him to feel that any talk with me was the worst talk he’s ever had in his life. I wasn’t supposed to make him feel this way. I am supposed to make him feel good, bring him up… not tear him down w/ my stupidness. I’m so sorry. I couldn’t stop telling him how sorry I am and how much I loved him. I love him so much.

That’s how we also got on another subject. I explained to him that I’m scared. Scared b/c I think he might be “The One.” It’s so fucking scary. But at the same time, I just want it to be. I feel that if we date again, we will probably not break up. I told him how he is the type of guy you marry… you don’t just hook up with Topher.. you bring him home to Mom, cook him dinner, and love him like he should be loved. You don’t fucking make out with some guy that you don’t know very well and fuck up everything. That’s why I think someone else out there is more deserving of him. He said that he felt the same way too though. So that made me feel good, at least I’m not a freak. I guess we will work it out if it truly is meant to be. But I think it could be. And at this age, it’s so scary. But he’s everything I want in a guy plus more. Smart, sexy, funny, worldly, caring… I miss him so fucking much.

I want to call him now… we talked one other time after this, just online.. and things seemed better. But I had a little breakdown in the gym while listening ot “Saving Grace” so that was bad. And then again upon seeing his entry. And I just want to have one now… no one’s in the room, apparently no one wants to hang out with me.. I think I’m just gonna call him. I wanted to see him so bad. This was something I would’ve wanted to tell him in person.. so I could hold him and explain to him just how sorry I am. I want to go to Iowa. I want to see him again, hug him, whisper that I love him and that I am so sorry for hurting him and that I never want to hurt him again. I want to tell him that he’s my best friend and that he’s always there for me, and that he means so much to me. I want to tell him all this.. but I want to do it while holding him. I want him to be here, so on nights like this when I don’t feel like doing anything, I can be with him and just sit and watch TV and hold
each other and kiss and laugh and fall asleep together. I’m gonna call him.

I Have A Stalker!!

Hello to my new stalker.. How fun is that!

Anyways, yesterday was really good. The night before Andrew and I had a nice long chat and I felt better about things. We also got to talk a lot online yesterday, so that was good.

Classes and work, that’s about all there was. In my work out class we had to team up with someone, and I’m teaming with this boy, Justin. I think that’s his name. He seems pretty nice, though really shy. Much like myself.

We’re both really big whimps too, we can only lift the bar. So it’s good that we both have about the same level. I guess. He’s a Comp E major (Freshman though). So at least we both have something to talk about. That class should be good. And if I keep up with my working out. All should be good and I should be hot! HOt! HOT!

(I really hate this keyboard, the shift key and many other random keys stick!)

Last night I didn’t really do much. I talked to my stalker online, and that was amusing. I had just gotten online to get a reference for a job app. But Andrew and stalker were online, so I spent an hour talking to both. Good times there.

After that I broke, went and turned in my app. Made copies at work, and then went to Lowes to get nails.

I hung up all the pics that I took down before Andrew left. And this time I actually put them in frames, and HUNG them on the wall, instead of just taping them to the wall. They’re very cute if I do say so myself. Though I can’t look at them too long, or I’ll start crying.

I have finally gotten to the point that I can look at the trip pics without crying though, so that’s good. (But I think I mentioned that a few days ago).

Called Andrew real quick to say night, and he was at some b-day party. Very amusing. Though that got me to thinking, and then it made me sad, because I know that on my bday I’ll probably be spending it alone, and it’s my 22nd b-day. Sad. I’m getting OLD! I’m going to need moral support!

Today I woke up at like 6:15, but didn’t have to be up tell 6:45, so I just laid in bed. Eventually got up and showered, etc. And caught the 7am bus to campus. Got here, and went to my first class. That was alright.

Forrest is in it, and as we were picking groups today, I was standing with the Italy group, cause I thought that would be a fun country to pick, then Forrest grabs me and is like, “Hey, we’re doing Europe in General, want to be in our group.” So I was like, “Sure”. So now we’re going to do Norway for our project! Good times.

After that I went to Pol Sci. That class was alright, we just watched a movie, so nothing to interesting.

We got out early, so that was good. Though now I have an UBER long time before my next class starts. Though I think I’ll break here soon and go tan, or something. I have work out clothes, but I Think that I’ll do that after my TransLog Class and before my Intro to Managemtne class.

Hopefully I’ll get a chance to talk to Andrew tonight. If not, I’ll give him a quick call before I go to bed. I hope that he doesn’t mind my calling!

Tonight’s the Alliance Ice Cream Social. I do beleive I’ll go, though I don’t really want to go alone. Always very embarrasing.

So we were 1 hour into my MGMT 414 class, and some guy walks into class, and walks all the way to the front of the room to sit down… He gets up there, starts to look at the board and then asks the professor. “Where am I?” The Prof then goes…”You’re in the middle of a class, please leave.” VERY FUNNY!

Oh, and for my MGMT 370 class we have a book report, and well the list that she gave us… Almost EVERY book that’s on there is on my amazon.com wishlist. Very amusing! (Which means that it’s a book I’ve been wanting to read) I was thinking that it was all going to be stupid books, but they are all cool books. I’m very excited for this. The reports due Nov 11, so I think that I should get started on reading the book. Good times.

Anyways, I have to go write a private and then break for class. Laters!

Bitch Bitch Bitch

So some people just don’t know when to stop bitching. We’ve been on this flight now for an hour and someone is still bitching about the same thing she was bitching about when she got on the god damn flight.

This plane has 6 seats, 3 on each side of the isle.

There’s a family, that needs 4 seats, 3 on one side of the isle, 1 on the other side. The other two seats are empty.

Another family gets on, they are spread all over the plane. 4 people, The dad talks to one of the attendants or whatever they are called, and gets it so that his wife and one of his SMALL (IE 5 or 6) children are sitting in those two empty seats next to the father of afore mentioned family. The other small child of family number 2 is in the middle seat infront of the mother and small child number 1. The father of family number 2 is in seat 16f, 10 rows infront of his wife and other SMALL children.

It becomes vary apparent that small child number 2 needs to sit next to mother. So the famther of Family number 1, sitting across the isle from his family and two TEENAGE kids offers to move foreward ONE row.

His wife then begins to throw a HUGE hissy fit, because they are doing things to to help family number 2 be closer together and they are pulling her family apart.

Now, first off, she has two TEENAGE kids, who I’m sure don’t want to sit next to each other, and REALLY don’t want to sit next to their mother who is now being UBER emarassing. I was embarrassed for them!

And secondly, the FATHER of family number 1 OFFERED to move so that family number 2’s children could both sit with their mother!

She bitched and bitched about it so much that they had to have the captian of the plane come back and ask her to calm down or else she would have to leave the plane.

I wanted to turn around and bitch at her and be like, WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU THINKING you stupid fucking woman!

She bitched so much, and no EVERYTIME that an attendant walks by she bitches at them some more about it. What a WHORE face.

God I really want to turn around and bitch slap her!

Anyways, other then that the flight is going really well. I’ve taken a few more pics and stuff, so that’s exciting. I got out my computer so that I could put them on here, but I can’t find the thing to do that. So It’ll have to wait tell I get home, or at least to the airport so that I can dig through my bag a bit more.

My flight left right on time, and we’re going to be into Huston a bit early, so hopefully Andrew and Sue’s flight is going well too.

It’s very pretty flying up here today, just the right amount of clouds and you can see the ground pretty clearly. It’s so pretty. Really makes me want to fly more often then I do. I hope that I can continue to afford to fly some.

Oh, I forgot to mention that Andrew’s Grandpa gave me a hug at the airport, I thought that was really sweet of him.

Anyways, I’m going to go look at my pictures now. Laters all!

Not Far From The Truth

Well, you know what It’s a really good thing that I didn’t type a 3 page long private update and have Microsoft Works randomly stop responding just as I was finishing up about today.

Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

UBER PISSED!

And let’s be honest, not that I don’t want to write it all again, but I’m just not going to, it was fucking 3 pages and took like 45 minutes.

Goddammit.

This weekend was very good.

Swimming at gray’s lake w/ creepies. Eating good dinner at Beckys. Rimming in the hot tub. Fingering all over the place. Cumming a lot that night.
Damn, now this update sucks b/c I’m cranky about losing the last one.

Adventureland today was really really fun. Chris came over at like 10:30, and then we left w/ Erin and Court and headed out. Got there and got in and started riding rides.

There was a bit of a problem w/ the roller coaster situation. Chris doesn’t go on roller coasters but I really wanted him to. In my mind, I was hoping that one day he would be able to tell people that he hated roller coasters but that this guy Andrew that he knew forced him to go on one once, and it changed his life forever, and now he isn’t afraid at all. I just wanted to help my baby. But it’s ok, he didn’t see it that way and that’s fine. Everyone likes different things. It wasn’t enough to cause a fight or anything, just a minor annoyance on Chris’ part and a little frustration on mine. No biggie though.

The Race thingy was uber fun. As soon as we got our first clue, Ryan was off running. We tried to keep up but we had to run. Anyways Chris and I ran a LOT. We had to keep going on different rides, and it was fun b/c we would try to barter w/ people in line so that we could get ahead of them and make it. Anyways lots of running, lots of laughs and our team ended up coming in first!!!! YAY!!! We got 20 Adventureland Bucks. I used mine on food and games. I lost all the games, and was really pissed about it. More pissed than I should’ve been, since they were just stupid games. But it really annoyed me.

Didn’t really do much after that, came back here and layed w/ Chris for awhile, didn’t really want to ever get up but eventually we had to. Chris apparently thinks that he is the one who suggests that it is time for me to leave when I come up on Wednesday, which is completely untrue. I always do. Then he states he forces me out and feels bad. I never really feel forced, but it makes me feel really stupid when he says that. I can’t really explain it, it almost feels like he’s saying Yeah so you can’t leave on your own, so I have to force you out Anyways, I know that isn’t it, so no need to dwell on it.

Said goodbye and it was sad and I think at one point Chris was either A. About to tear up or B. tearing up. Which I find so incredibly touching. I mean David cried a few times during our relationship, but it was usually over something stupid, and not anything actually involving me. It just shows me that he cares.

Now he’s gone and I’m sad. But he asked me to spend the night on Tuesday, so hopefully I can. And then Wednesday is our 2 month! My 2nd longest relationship, set to be the longest.

Here’s a little secret: I don’t have anything for him yet. I was SO fucking busy last week, plus I saw him EVERY day, so there was no time for me to get something. Plus, the damn thing I’m looking for, I can’t fucking find. So annoying. And I feel bad b/c I didn’t plan this well enough, and I wanted to do something original and creative, but yeah doesn’t look like it’s gonna happen. I will make myself a note to begin work on a 3rd month present to make up for my lack of preparedness this month. And I know the material things are not a big deal, but I still want to get my Topher something nice. Hopefully he will like what I end up getting.

So random thought: the other Saturday at work before we went to the zoo, I was talking to Cara and Jean about going to the zoo etc, and completely randomly Cara is like So you’re in love with Chris? And I was like What?? Where did that come from? And she was like Spending the night with his grandparents, going on a trip to the zoo, you two are obviously in love. I was like Ooooook….. Very odd, but I don’t feel it’s far from the truth. Well, I hope it’s not.

Anyways to recap quickly since it all got lost, last week was very good. I surprised Chris on Monday in Ames and spent the night, he came down Tuesday and spent the night and we hung out all day Wednesday. Didn’t do much of any real importance.

Had a cry fest Wed. night b/c I suddenly had a panic attack about leaving and stuff. I just got in one of those moods that I can get in. Yeah so we cried and kissed and talked about stuff, I felt better afterwards but I did not want Chris to leave me. So sad.

And now I’m gonna be gone in a week again too. That will suck. Even more so than the other week. Well, it will and it won’t. It will b/c I won’t be doing anything there, like I was on the cruise. But it won’t b/c I will have access to a phone so I can talk to Chris whenever I want to. So that works out pretty good.\

Hmmm anything else important?

Other weekend memories
Screaming Woman
I really wanna fuck your hot ass
Reinstating Sister, sister The Proud Family

And a couple weeks back, it was really really funny, we were leaving my house and Chris was like Damn I should’ve brought my sunglasses, it’s so bright. And I was like Yeah, you are probably blind. And he goes I am. Then he proceeds to walk with his hands out, like he’s searching for something and going Where’s the car??? It was SOOOOO funny. I still laugh when I think about it.

Anyways.

All in all a great week. Can’t wait to see him again. Lots of scandalous ness to talk about real quick. I gave him head in the skywalks, and just recently on top off the parking garage by Javas. It was really embarrassing though b/c he was dry humping me and licking me and I turned around for something and there was definitely some woman who came out of the building and who was walking towards her car and saw us. I was so embarrassed, I just ran away. Funny though.

Dinner at Becky’s was uber good, even though there were really scary people at Gray’s Lake.

And so my WinAmp keeps going pink floyd, alanis, erykah badu, pink floyd, alanis, erykah badu it’s really fucking annoying.

Anyways, that’s about it, I miss my Topher man!

BREAK!

A Weekend of Tiredness

So what all has Chris been up to lately?

One hell of a lot! I left work early Friday to go help my dad get my mom’s b-day present. I had to leave 4 hours early to go help him. We get home, I take all my shit inside, including my backpack which still had my cell phone in it. And then we leave.

We had to drive to the Airport because my dad rented my mom a mustang for the week. We drive there, a good 80 all the way because I hate driving my dad places. I also have the windows down and the music loud so that I couldn’t talk to him. We get there and I had to park cause he wanted me to come in incase there was something wrong and they didn’t have the car ready or something. So I follow him in, he hands me $3 for parking. I’m like, hello? How about paying me for the gas that I wasted driving all the way from Ames, to our house, and then to the Airport, or how about paying me for the 4 hours that I had to miss from work. He gets the keys and then walks off.

No “Hey, thanks” for driving him there, no thanks for taking time off work. Nothing. You know, I really didn’t have to go and help him. I really didn’t have to, but I was being nice by taking time off work. And one other question I have, why didn’t Andy just drive him. He’s got a car, he could have just followed him home. Why the hell couldn’t Andy have done this. I was so pissed off by that time at that asshole. Thanks alot!

So I get back on Highway 5 bypass cause I wanted to get back to WDW to get some things for Andrew, and a b-day card for his mom. By this time it was 4:15 or so. I start driving, doing a good 80, when about 2 miles from the Fluer exit, traffic suddenly STOPS! I was like, “Great, just what I need.” I figured it was just road work or something, and we’d get through it fairly quickly. So I stick it out, and get up a little closer (Because everyone was turning around in the median, and being complete assholes about it) and I see that it’s actually an accident and the entire road is BLOCKED! So I get up to a spot where my little car can make the median and turn around. Drive back to Fluer, get off and then drive ALL THE WAY through downtown DM, through rush-hour traffic and get onto 235, again more rush hour traffic. I finally made it to WDW and go to B&N to price a book for my mom about 5:15ish. I wanted to have everything done and have made it back to PC to get my phone, which I forgot initially and then back to Waukee to meet Andrew shortly after 5:30. Well, I knew I wouldn’t make it to PC and back in time, and by that time I was so pissed at all the STUPID drivers that I just drove to Andrew’s office and surprised him there. I think he liked the surprise and it was really good to see him, it made me happier.

From there we went to his house and talked and hung out the whole night with his sister. It was his mom’s b-day and we were waiting around for her and John to get back from supper so that we could surprise her. They finally got back around 8:30 or so, we did the surprise thing, ate so cake and then Andrew and I were off. I felt very weird being there bacuse it was all his family and then me. Very odd.

We went over to girls house and watched some movie. I was so tired by then that I don’t remember what it’s called. But I do remember that it was amusing.

After that we went home.

Saturday I got up fairly early and did a whole bunch of stuff. I don’t remember most of it. But I got a lot done.

After that I met up with Andrew after he got off work. We went out driving to do some errands. I had to go to Christian Photo to get some stuff, and after that we were on the way to his peircing place, but got side tracked by some garage sales. That was UBER fun and there were like 10 on every block! great times. After that we went to his peircer to find out what’s wrong with his eyebrow ring. He really doesn’t want to take it out, and I don’t want him to either! It’s so hot!

After that we went downtown to Sal-Val. I got some cute shirts as did Andrew. We’re both on budgets this summer, so we’ll be shopping there! We haven’t been to the mall to actually buy something in forever!

From there to beak’s. We went “swimming” at gray’s lake with her and leper boy. The water was too cold to go swimming because it really wasn’t warm enough to go. But there were tons of white trash there. We didn’t stay long cause beak was the only one swimming, although I think it would have been nice to stay a bit longer. I just wish we had the weather we had today, yesterday and the weather yeasterday today!

We left the lake and went back to Beak’s where we had the grilling fiasco. None of the grills worked, so we cooked inside. It was all still really really good! I need to hang out with Beak some more so that I can get my cooking expertise back again! After the food we hung around and talked for a while. Andrew and I left and went back to my house where we hot tubbed and spent the rest of the night just talking random talk! I drove him home and he was talking random talk and very incoherant. It was crazy!

This morning I slept in because it’s been long nights all week long and I was so tired! I got up showered and then headed over to Andrew’s. I wasn’t even in the door when Sue visiously attacked me and asked for a hug, and said that she didn’t hate me, and just really embarrassed me! It was very weird.

Met up with Girl #1 and Girl #2. Off to Adventurland we went. I had a REALLY great time there. I went on far more rides then I usually do, thanks to Drew Bear. Though I still wouldn’t go on the rollercoasters. They’re just too scary for me yet. Though I’d like to try one again some day. I did get quite annoyed a few times there with all the peer-pressure and shit to go on rides that I didn’t want too. Other then that it was a GREAT day. The Amazing Race that we did was TONS of fun and I ran around all of Adventure land barefoot because I was wearing sandles that you can’t run in. Now I have two really BIG blisters on the bottom of my feet and it hurts imensily to walk/do anything with my feet. But had a GREAt time.

After Adventure land I really wanted to go back to my house and swim, but Andrew and I decided to just stay at his and hand out, which we did. More good times, and Sue was uber nice to me! lol

Well, I’m really tired of typing so I’m done with this. I know there’s a lot that I forgot about, but I’ll put that in the private update which I’ll write laters!

Laters!