No… YOU’RE Out Of Context…

So.. Well this is the THIRD post that I’ve written today… And as you can tell, none of the other’s have actually posted… FUCKERS! Every computer that I’ve used has died just as I was getting to the end of the post. The first one was like 2 pages long… And then Netscape died. The second one was an abriged version of the first one. When I went to hit “Blog This!” IE decided that it couldn’t find the page to post it too. Fucker. So I lost that one. And then the third time, the whole fucking computer up and shit on me. RARR! So this one better fucking work!

So Friday was good, we went out and did stuff with a hell of alot of gay people… There were also alot of new gay people, who were cute. However, not the nicest people ever. Well at least in my encounters with them they haven’t been. But anyway, Friday was TONS of fun…

That night Adam and I went back to my Apartment and spent the night hanging out… Well actually we were way to tired to do anything, so we went str8 to bed once we got back, but it’s still nice to have him there.. That place gets so lonely at night.

Saturday we got up bright and early and headed back to Ankeny for a garge sale thing. I wanted to buy a Mac, but they only had old 5260/100’s and older machines. I was hoping for at least an original IMac or something, but nope. So we didn’t get anything. From there we went back to Adam’s house and he called his mom to see what we were doing. She said that she couldn’t get a hold of the guy to find out what we needed to until “later.” Adam assumed that would mean like 1 or so. So we said alright… What to do now. We decided to go see Andrew at work and get one of his 6 foot subs for $3.50 that he swore up and down they were going to have. When Adam called him mom to tell her to call him on his cell phone when she found out what to we were going to do she essentialy flipped. So we went there instead and started picking up trash and the like. It was fun working there. Although I have a HUGE blister that popped now on my thumb. It really hurts to even get water in it! Ouch!

After we were done working there we went back to Adam’s and showered and then went off and did random things. After a while we met up with Andrew downtown. It looked as if was just going to be us three that night.. But people eventually started showing up and everyone from Friday night was there again. It was much fun and I’m enjoying myself alot more. I’m starting to feel at ease with them all. Andrew, Adam and I had a hilarious talk about dildos and the like. That was great and Mike and Andrew both molested me. Ha, it was great.

We also ran into Julian and Dean downtown. It was good to see them again. We really should hang out with them sometime, it’s been so long since we did that… Perhaps another road trip somewhere would be in order! lol. But anyway, they’re going to the Cher concert. I really want to go to the Cher concert.

After we left downtown, I took Adam home and then went home myself. I told him that I’d probably sleep in really late, so not to expect me anytime in the early morning.

Sunday morning however, was I in for a surprise. My family decided that they wanted to rip half the house off, in the early morning FREEZING hours. I had to get up and help them tear out the fireplace cause they’re getting a new one tomorrow. So my dad took all the siding and stuff off the outside wall of the chimney and we had to push the fireplace out from the inside. We now have a large picture window where there once was a fireplace, and that made the house VERY cold all fucking day.

It was kinda cute though cause like 10 seconds after we had the opening and the old fireplace out of the way, Gordy jumped up onto the platform and walked right into the house as if that doorway had always been there. lol. Perhaps I’ll get pictures once we get them developed.

Oh, that’s another thing, Andrew and I were twins on Saturday night, I really wished I had taken my camera with us. It would have been great!

But anyways, after we were done with the fireplace work, I called Adam and he was still in bed. So that was cool, cause I told him that I’d probably sleep in late. He called me though about 12 and said that his dad had called and he had to go have lunch with him. He said he’d be back around 3. So I was annoyed much by this, but was ok. I wasn’t annoyed at Adam, but the fact that his dad feels he can just call after a month of not talking to them, and expect Adam to drop everything he was doing to go have lunch. Perhaps if he wanted to have lunch, he could have made plans to do so, but I was expecting to have that time, and to not have to sit around and wait for him to show up.

So 3’o clock hit and Adam still hadn’t called me. I said alright. If I haven’t heard from him in 30 minutes, I’m going back to Ames, and thus, the pissed off mood set in. So I sat there, with both phones in my hand, waiting for them to ring. 3:30 approached and I was in the process of dialing Adam’s cell phone when my cell phone rang. It was him, saying that he was just leaving his dad’s house and that he’d be home in 20 minutes. I said fine. That I’d meet him there. He called back about 5 minutes later, just as I was gettin ready to leave and said that he’d just meet me at my house, and that we could go to Saylorville. I said alright.

About 10 to 4 he called from his house and said that he had to go to Wal-Mart, and get the pictures that we took last weekend. I said alright. But was oh so pissed by then. About 4:15 he still wasn’t there, so I called him ready to tell him to just turn around and go back home, that I was going back to Ames. He said that he was like 2 seconds from my house, so I said alright.

He got there and I tried to be friendly as I could, we sat on the front porch and talked about the pictures and his visit with his dad. From there we went to Big Creek and walked around. It was nice to just hang out and stuff, although he was more interested in the damn trees then he was with me trying to be semi-romantic (arm around while walking, etc.). After that we were heading to Saylorville when we drove past the pizza place in PC. He offered to buy pizza so we stopped there and ate supper. I love thier pizza. We sat in there and I reminiced (sp) about how it used to be my dad’s store, etc.

It was hard to hold back the tears as I sat there and told him exactly where everything was supposed to have been, the early mornings that I worked there, starting when I was like 10. The dreams that I had had, hoping to get the store when I “grew up.” Sunday night was the first time I’d ever been in there since he closed, and it was hard. It’s hard for me now to not scream at the ass hole for closing it, because it was so much a part of me. Even though it is really just a stupid store, it was a part of me, because he bought it the same year that I was born. It just really meant alot to me.

I understand why he closed it though, because of the way that people in PC are. They just don’t beleive in supporting local businesses, sure we may have been a bit more expensive then Dalh’s of Hy-Vee, but we were there in town, we offered fresh produce, we got fresh meat nearly every day, and cut it in house. We’d cut it how you wanted it. But people in PC just like to complain. They complained when we had the store, and they complained when we closed it. Because they said “It was such a great thing for the town.” Yet when it was there, they just didn’t want to support it. Fuckers.

After pizza we departed our ways and I came back to Ames, I really didn’t want to though. I just wanted to hang out with Adam for a little longer. Oh well.

Today’s the first day of the fourth week of classes. It’s semi-exciting. The first round of tests are coming up. All on Wednesday. So I’m going to spend tonight studying. I’ll probaly stay on campus tell like 5 at least. Perhaps 6ish. Cause I just can’t study at home. Too many other things to do there. I can’t wait tell this semsters over though, just far to much stress. Rarr!

The Party!

So Friday night we went out, I was dead tired, but we went out and it was lots of fun. First we went to MHM to get Adam’s schedule and his paycheck. There were lots of antiques, and such there. WE stopped at this place (a post card selling booth) that claimed “If we don’t have your home town, you get a post card free.” So we stopped and asked for Lenox, where my G&G live. They had some… A 1908 picture of main street, it was really cool. Dirt roads… All the buildings are still the same as they are today, It was amazing, they also had a picture of the old depot, my G&G are the currators (sp?) of it, so I was excited. But they didn’t take credit cards and I didn’t have any cash on me. So we couldn’t get them. Damnit.

ON our way out we ran into Mike and Jenny. Jenny was having breakdown, and yeah. So we hung out there at the mall for like 30 minutes before Jenny randomly got up and left. It was fun, and yet sad… All at the same time! lol

From there we went to Mikes house so that he could change. Duncan was drooling and in pain, it was one of the funniest things I’ve seen in a long time! I’m glad I haven’t had to have my wisdom teeth out yet!

Off we went to Downtown. It was only 7, so there wasn’t ANYTHING going on, but we managed to entertain ourselves by throwing a large plastic container full of water off the bridge, it was amusing as hell! Everyone finally showed up like 9:30~10? Like everyone was there, and it was good times. I was dead tired though, so I wasn’t to good timesy, But still. it was a laugh and a half!

Adam and I went home about 11ish and that was the end of that! Saturday Adam called me at an ungodly hour in the morning and I met up with him about 10:30, from there we went to the mall and picked up those postcards, I now have my G&G shopped for for christmas! After that we went off to Budget to make back the 27.56 that I had just spent. We worked for like 2.5 hours, so it was alright, made back all but 10 of it, however… I now only have $6 left, oopps!

We had come back to Adam’s house when he realized he didn’t have his phone, so we went back to the southside, and whilst we were there stopped at the porn store….. Adam didn’t have his ID, so he had to wait in the car while I went in and got the porn… I hate doing that, but today it was alright, cause the HOTTEST boi I’ve seen ever was there! Yeah. So from there we went back to Adam’s house and hung out. It was really good times!

OH! on the way to budget the first time, we were playing with Adam’s phone. Saying random things into it and seeing who it would call… Things like Leonard Boswell (his Grandma), Your Mom (James), Johny Carson (Angela), and last but not least… And by far the funniest… The Anti-Christ…. SCOTT! heheh!

So yeah, that’s been our weekend so far. Today Adam has to work from 12:30 to 5:30 or some crazy shit like that, and I have to go back home and fix the PU’s computers…. Damnit! Perhaps I’ll get them to buy a new one, eh!

Oh well, I’m off now to do other random shit! Laters all!

Adam’s Conversation 2

11:35:41 pischkoa: Hello?

11:35:47 Adam – Sluk: Hi

11:35:54 pischkoa: How are you?

11:36:01 Adam – Sluk: OK

11:36:09 Adam – Sluk: Nervous

11:36:14 pischkoa: Why are you nervous?

11:36:21 Adam – Sluk: About tonight

11:36:34 pischkoa: Oh, the movie thing?? Have you talked to Kim about it yet?

11:37:10 Adam – Sluk: I’m going to cal her in a bit

11:37:14 pischkoa: Ahh.

11:37:49 pischkoa: So what else is up?

11:37:50 Adam – Sluk: Kit called me this morning and said she had a pseudo script and for us to PLEASE change it as we see fit. She was going to email it to me so I got on to check

11:37:59 pischkoa: I see.

11:40:03 pischkoa: You’re mad aren’t you.

11:40:35 Adam – Sluk: A bit yes

11:40:41 pischkoa: Why?

11:43:04 Adam – Sluk: Well yesterday I talked to you, I was really upset but in the end I felt a bit better about the whole situation. Then last night someone downtown asked if you were upset, I asked why and he told me about your away message last night. That’s when I called you.

11:43:04 Adam – Sluk: I wasn

11:43:04 Adam – Sluk: ‘t very happy last night

11:46:50 pischkoa: 1) Who told you about it? 2) I wasn’t very happy last night either, or the night before… Wed night you had to work, after you got off I figured you would at least call em to see if I wanted to do anything for a while, you never did. That made me sad. I cried the whole fucking night, then last night, I was going to go out as well… But you never even asked, you just assumed that I wasn’t, now I’ll give you the fact that I hadn’t been going out, but when I said three times that “I guess I won’t get to see you tonight since you’re already going out with missy” and other things along those lines, and you never even gave it a second chance, you say that it hurts you when you go out without me, but yet you never really seem to make move to try even ask if I wanted to go out. That really upset me, the whole night last night, from the time I left myoffice tell the time I went to bed, there were tears rolling down my face cause I didn’t know what the hell was going on. I didn’t know what the hell you were thinking…. I was upset as hell last night.

11:50:34 Adam – Sluk: You said yourself that you wouldn’t see me on wednesday becasue I worked and on thursday you had a paper to write. As far as I was told you couldn’t do anything. I wanted to. And when you said “I guess I won’t see you tonight…” I took that as you couldn’t do anything. Ou know you’re welcome to go out with me anytime…not even “welcome” but we SHOULD be together whenever we can. You shouldn’t have to be invited. After 6 months it’s just second nature. When we’re free, we’re together

11:51:56 Adam – Sluk: But regardless of misunderstandings between us, saying relationsips suck on AIM for everyone to see…why?

11:53:15 pischkoa: Cause I was pissed off, I was mad, I was upset. Damnit. I was fucking crying my eyes out last night.

11:54:50 Adam – Sluk: And you thought that would help. After hearing about that I had my share of crying too. When I didn’t invite you I didn’t mean anything. History should show you that I simply don’t get your “subtle hints” but you saying that was blatently mean…I don’t care how upset you were that was un called for

11:56:32 pischkoa: Fine, I’m sorry for saying that.

11:56:55 Adam – Sluk: That’s not how this works Chris.

11:57:08 pischkoa: Well then how _does_ it work.

11:59:03 Adam – Sluk: This is silly. It’s not my fault that you can’t go out, you said your self you don’t blame me for it. But yet I get all bad vibes. I feel bad simply for doing anything at all becasue you’re at home or work. I can’t keep track of your schedule any better than you can keep track of mine, especually when we’re apart. There was no reason you couldn

11:59:45 Adam – Sluk: ‘t have said “You want to do something tonight?” and there would have been no problem. But instead you droppped hints that I obviously didn’t pick up on, and you blamn it on me

12:00:55 Adam – Sluk: Then in your anger you say something like that, that I didn’t even see but rather hear about from other people. Thats bull

12:02:04 pischkoa: I’m not blaming shit on you. I’m venting my anger towards you and I’m sorry I’m doing that.

12:02:07 Adam – Sluk: I’ve made every attempt to try and help things, we’ve talked about this, we’ve tried and everytime we come out feeling like we’ve accomplished something yet nothing happens, and more anger incurs, what are we going to? Some sort of scheduling has to take place

12:02:43 Adam – Sluk: If you’re vent ing your anger towards me, then how do I come out being the bad guy?

12:03:40 pischkoa: I don’t know.

12:03:58 Adam – Sluk: you never did…But you never even asked, …and you never even gave it a second chance

12:04:08 Adam – Sluk: And you are blaming me

12:06:58 pischkoa: I don’t know what to say, fine I’m wrong for blaming you, I’m sorry for making you feel bad, I’m sorry for everything and anything I’ve ever said to you to make you feel like shit.

12:08:36 Adam – Sluk: You don’t have to say anything. It’s what you ARE saying that made me mad. I mean the away message had one intention. and it wasn’t one of “hey Just so you know where I am…” like most away messages

12:10:53 Adam – Sluk: During this whole situation, I’ve somehow felt this was my fault, that I was doing something wrong, but the truth was neither of us were to blame. We were in a shitty situation and there was no good way out. I tried to handle everything as best I could, and as did you. But last night was upsetting for both of us because you lost your temper. That can’t be made better by saying “Fine I’m sorry”

12:11:18 pischkoa: I’m sorry for everything, I’ve been through enough in the last two days, enough crying enough wondering if we’re going to be together tomorrow, enough cryng because I don’t know if I’ll have boyfriend whom I dealry love and can’t stand being apart from, over the last two days, you’ve said that you had doubts about our relationshipa nd you wouldn’t tell me what you ment by that. I don’t doubt our relationship, I think that we’re strong, but I just don’t know what to think now, I don’t know what the hell is going on damnit. I don’t mean to hurt you, but when I get hurt, I do what seems like the right thing to do. At the time I felt like that, and I wanted someone to talk to, you weren’t there, I couldn’t talk to you, I put up an away message about my feelings and I left, I went and cried in the shower. Damnit, I’m sorry.

12:11:45 pischkoa: Alright, now you’re blaming this on me. And I don’t like that. I did not lose my temper, I was sad, I was upset, I felt like shit. Don’t dare blam this on me.

12:14:53 Adam – Sluk: OK I’m sorry, but I never doubted us till last night. When my boyfriend, my love, my soul mate says relationshps suck I wonder why he’s in one then. I wa soo scared last night, we left downtown I bawled the whole way telling Missy how sacred I was, how scared I was that you were giving up, that we were falling apart, that I was losing you. I lost you once, volentarily I add, I NEVER want to lose you again. It pains me to be apart from you as it pains you I’m sure, then hearing that when I thought we were on the road to recovery hurts me very deeply. I didn’t know what to think

12:16:57 Adam – Sluk: I though that you were done, I thought “who knows where we’ll be in the next couple days” for the first time since out first break up, I was scared for us. I hated that feeling. I can’t take it. I didn’t sleep last night. I almost came to POlk City at 3 this morning and shaking you and screaming “What’s happening?”

12:18:41 Adam – Sluk: After many a little tiff, 6 months into the relationship we hit this. And since this a first, neither of us know who to deal. But I learned last night, that Julian and Dean had a very similer experience, and they weathered that storn just fine, as I know we will, one way or another

12:20:21 Adam – Sluk: Please say something…

12:20:55 pischkoa: If I were done then I called you back at 11 when you called, if I were done then I would have come to downtown and told you that I was through with you… But I didn’t because I wasn’t done, I don’t want to lose you ever again, I went thgouh it once and these last couple days it’s felt like I’ve lost you again, for me it’s felt that way. That you were already gone. I didn’t know what to think of things last night, I didn’t want to give up. I was going to drive downtown numerous times and tell you, that damnit I wanted to go out last night. I wanted to, and when you called last night, I hoped that maybe you would come over so we could talk about it. But you never did. I was going to drive over there, but I didn’t know how you were feeling or what you were feeling, I thought it the worst and I didn’t want to face that then. I know that we’ll get through this in time, but we HAVE to talk more, you have to be more receptive and think more of me, and I have to tell you more str8 out about what I want and what I’m thinking, we both have our flaws, but that’s the way the world works. We’ll get through it.

12:23:02 Adam – Sluk: I know we will. And I’m not blaming this one you, but I truly think part of this stems from the meds, or lack thereof. We need to work to fix whatever problems yu have.

12:23:27 Adam – Sluk: Because your problems, are our problems

12:23:31 pischkoa: And youneed to work to fix the problems you have as well.

12:23:36 Adam – Sluk: I know.

12:24:15 pischkoa: So are we better now?

12:24:27 Adam – Sluk: Not yet, but we will be…

12:24:37 pischkoa: … What?

12:24:48 Adam – Sluk: We can go somewhere and talk tomorrow after I gte off work

12:25:08 pischkoa: Why not tonight, after the Movie thing.

12:25:36 Adam – Sluk: We can, I think everyone wants to go out after if you want to too. But we can if it would be better

12:25:55 pischkoa: I think it would be better. I can’t stand another night of this shit.

12:26:07 Adam – Sluk: OK. We can go somewhere and talk

12:26:41 Adam – Sluk: Let’s go to nalan plaza and talk. I found last night it’s a good place for thinking.

12:26:49 pischkoa: Fine

12:26:54 Adam – Sluk: No fines

12:27:10 Adam – Sluk: OK works better

12:27:10 pischkoa: I still want to know who told you.

12:27:51 Adam – Sluk: That’s not important. They wern’t trying to cause trouble, they wanted to make sure out fairy tale romance was still ok

12:28:04 pischkoa: I know, but I want to know who it was.

12:28:15 Adam – Sluk: OK…Mike

12:28:32 pischkoa: Ok

12:30:22 Adam – Sluk: So I have to be at the Church at 5 to set up, so are you going to meet us there?

12:30:34 Adam – Sluk: Do you wanna come early and help set up too?

12:30:42 pischkoa: I was planning on meeting you at your house.

12:30:51 Adam – Sluk: What time are you off?

12:30:56 pischkoa: When ever I want to be.

12:31:19 pischkoa: I can leave at 3 if you want, or even 2:30

12:31:19 Adam – Sluk: Ah, well tha works. I didn’t think you got off till 4:30 or something

12:31:41 Adam – Sluk: OK the call me when you get into ANkeny. I should be home, but just in case

12:32:02 Adam – Sluk: Umm if you wanna come earlier that’s cool, but anytime around 4 is cool

12:32:08 pischkoa: Fine

12:32:14 Adam – Sluk: No fines….

12:32:22 Adam – Sluk: : )

12:33:50 pischkoa: What about the Wayne Newton bridge?

12:33:55 pischkoa: Yeah you know, the one they’ll build in 2031 to connect The Las Vegas Islands to the Arizonian mainland?

12:33:57 Adam – Sluk: WHAT?!?!

12:34:19 Adam – Sluk: Adams confused

12:34:32 pischkoa: Nevermind then.

12:34:35 Adam – Sluk: lol

12:34:40 Adam – Sluk: What was that?

12:34:49 pischkoa: It was _supposed_ to be a joke.

12:35:04 Adam – Sluk: It was funny, where’d it come from though?

12:35:14 pischkoa: http://slashdot.org/article.pl?sid=02/06/07/1412217&mode=nested&tid=126&threshold=2

12:35:21 Adam – Sluk: Ah

12:35:44 pischkoa: I have to go work, brb

12:36:22 Adam – Sluk: OK Well I’m going to find something to eat. See you around 3 or 4?

12:37:39 pischkoa: Yeah.

12:37:42 Adam – Sluk: Bye!

12:37:45 Adam – Sluk: I love you!

12:37:51 pischkoa: Bye!. Love you too

12:37:56 Adam – Sluk: *hugs*

12:38:01 Adam – Sluk: *extra hugs*

12:38:04 pischkoa: ::hugs::

12:38:07 pischkoa: :-*

12:38:10 Adam – Sluk: Bye

Adam – Sluk is logged out @ Fri Jun 7 12:43:11 2002.

Monday, Monday

Hmmm, well today’s been alright so far I guess. My alarm went off at 7:30, I was going to get up and read and study some before class, since I had missed Friday. I removed the sheets and instatanly froze, so I covered back up and decided to wait a bit to get up.. I fell back asleep. I woke up again at 8 and tried getting out of bed again. I decided that the bed was better then getting up, so I laid there tell 9:30. I pulled the blanket down with me as I got out of bed, just to stay warm. It was fucking freezing in here. I got my towel and headed to the bathrooms, it was warm in there. I took a nice hot shower. I didn’t want to get out. I headed off to class about 10 and went and got some food. Classes were alright I supposed. I’ve got a test tomorrow in Cs207, that should be fairly easy.

I read alot of my bind book today. I’m up to actually setting up the servers… It’s kind of confusing cause I don’t have a group of computers that I want to set up… I just have the one. So I don’t know how to work that with the ISU network so that it all works out alright. But I think it should be alright. I’m going to set up my initial server here in a bit.

Speaking of bind and such… Someone left a really nasty comment on Julians website posing as me. I’ve traced the IP down to an ISP based in Mo. That’s about as far as I can go. I sent that info to Julian, so I dunno if he’ll do anything with it. People are just so rude.

OK, I’m off to understand bind and hopefully get a server up and running… Perhaps I’ll end up installing Redhat on my old beast here sometime.

Disclaimer

Ok so this is just for people’s information. I steal alot of stuff and ideas
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