So Alone..

I feel so alone right now… I am not sure why. I have met some really fun new friends here in Redondo Beach. I’ve been keeping really busy with things, I went out all night Friday night, was busy all day Saturday except for a few hours where I took a nap and then will be busy pretty much all day Sunday.

But I still feel just so alone.

I keep killing myself, yelling at myself for not going back to Iowa sooner when things were getting worse with my grandpa. I feel like such an asshole to wait and get work done and not spend the extra money.

If only I had gone a day earlier. I could have had a day with grandpa. If only I had spent the extra $300, I could have had an hour with him… If only. I hate myself for not going. For not getting the chance to say goodbye. For not getting the chance to tell him how much I am going to miss him.

I hate that he’s gone and that he won’t be at my wedding, to meet my boyfriends. He won’t be there to tell how they shoved a camera up his dick. lol. It hurts me every time I call my grandma and he doesn’t answer the phone.

I just feel so alone…

Const is in Houston!

Road trip to Houston!!!

This past week I have been on a road trip to Houston! Constantine has moved there for the next 6 months! 🙁

So Tuesday was not a very good day for me. I had a 4 hour meeting I had to prepare for, and I had to prepare to be out of the office for the next week and a half (I am in training this week). So I email all my clients and tell them that I will be gone, most of them were like. “Ok whatever”. Well one of them emailed me back and was all bitchy and was like. “I was expecting things to be done this week! blah blah blah. So I had to come pu with a way that I could work while traveling. I installed Windows 2003 on my external drive so that I could use Parallels, then installed MsSQL so that I had the DB. Then I had y 4 hour meeting which ended up only lasting 2 hours. Got done with that and it was noon and I wanted to go home. But As soon as I got back to my desk I had three clients IMing me wanting help with shit! UGH! Very annoying. I ended up getting out of the office at 2:30. Rushed home because Const said he’d be there in about 2 hours (when I talked to him at 2).

Get home and shower and pack real quick and what not… And then ended up sitting around till 6 when he finally got there. We went out to dinner with Sirin to Hennessey’s for burgers.

Got home that night and just hung out at the house and watched TV. Got up at 8 on Wed and had breakfast at this new Crepe place in Redondo Beach. We had a HOT french/russian/vietnamese waiter. He was really ncie too, we talked to him for a while and what not. The food was excellent! I would highly suggest going there and checking it out. It’s on the corner of Ave I and Catalina.

Got in the car and headed out after that. I plugged in my external drive (one of those portable ones that’s powered off USB) and worked away for a few hours. About the time I was finishing up, the hard drive suddenly says it’s been disconnected…. IT was still connected to me!!! So I unplug it and plug it back in… “Please initialize this drive”!

WTF! So I freak out because this drive has ALL my windows installations that I use for work, and training and playing and testing and everything else! PLUS It has ALL THE INFORMATION I need to be able to do work on this trip! VERY ANNNOYING!

The rest of the drive wasn’t too bad. 530 miles that day. Some VERY pretty wild flowers and stuff along the way. Got to the hotel and it was amazing. It was basically a HUGE apartment. Hung out there for a couple minutes and then went to dinner at an Asian place.

Thursday we got up at 8:30 again and we were on the road by 10. 550 miles that day. Lots of VERY VERY boring flat lands. Const spent hours calling all the apartments. I am SOOO jealous of these Texas apartments. 2 bedrooms with granite and hard wood floors and all this sweeeeet shit for WAY LESS then what I pay for a crappy 1 bedroom! Some of the places even have FREE starbucks coffee and fluff and fold service! UGH! That night we watched a comedian called Daniel Tosh. He’s very very funny. You should all go check it out.

Friday, 1610 miles later we MADE IT! 🙂 We got here and ate dinner at this very yummy Steak house called Smith & Wollensky got to the hotel and figured out plans for Saturday and then watched Americal Idol!

Satrday we got up at 8 and headed out to this place called Le Peep for breakfast. I got the blueberry pancakes which were not that good. But Const got bannana nut waffles which were delicious! After that we started looking at apartments. I think we went to like 10 different places. The second place we saw SMELLED soooooo fucking bad! GROSS! I wanted to puke when we walked into the stairwell to the apartment! The 4th place was just amazing! Very industrial with concrete floors and exposed duct work and what not. HUGE tub. It was SO CUTE! All the other places were really nice as well. At the end of the day we headed back to place number 4 to put down the money and what not. We get there and some guy is putting the deposit down on the apartment Const wanted. :'( So we went back to the third place which was also very nice and he got that one. I sure hope he will like it.

Saturday night we went out to a bar called “South Beach” which was tons of fun! Dancing and drinking and what not.

Sunday we slept in and then went shopping for stuff for his apartment. Got some really cute plates and what not from Pier 1. I think once I am back to LA I will go buy 2 more sets so that when he gets back we’ll have a 4some! haha. We went and saw the movie “Jumper” which was pretty good. After that we went back to the hotel and laid in the bed for a couple hours before my flight. I wanted to just bawl, but I held it back… I just realized that I forgot to get one last picture of us together there in Houston! Awwww. Anyways, we left the hotel and tried finding food on the way to the airport. That was one crazy adventure. We ended up in some GHETTO Popeye’s and got chicken. Seriously. I mean GHETTO! Got to the airport and it was very sad, but I held it together. I can’t wait to see him again.

LACMA Dali and Petersen Automotive Museum

Another good weekend.

Friday night Constantine, Sirin, Chris and I all went out to Nunsense at the Torrance Theater. Sirin wanted to see Constantine’s new car, so we rode in it. It’s a really nice car, but still…. I will admit I’m a very jealous of it now.

Anyways, we also went out to this really yummy restaurant called Bluewater Grill. I had the prime rib, which was very yummy!

Came home after that and went to bed.

Saturday we got up and drove up to LA to see the Dali Exhibit at LACMA. It was a really good exhibit. Who knew that Dali did a movie with Disney?!?! Crazy stuff! I hated all the people there though.

After that we walked across the street to the Petersen Automotive Museum. I’ve been wanting to go to that for a while and it was nice, but not exactly what I was expecting. Way too many ghetto modified cars and not enough historic cars if you ask me. But it was still good to finally get to go. Walked up the street to the farmers market and ate lunch/dinner and then drove home.

We watched Chicken Run and made some of this crazy infused Vodka stuff! It’s gonna be delish! 🙂

Sunday we got up and went shopping for a while, then went and I got an eye exam, going to be getting new glasses hopefully before we leave for Europe! Came home from that and went for a walk on the beach and then took a nap before the Sunday night dinner.

Met up with Sirin, Jason and Steve about 7:30 and had dinner at Sirin’s place. She made some REALLY good food! 🙂

Today/Tonight I must finish the planning of Vienna, start packing, and do a bunch of other stuff.

OH! Friday I also officially created our LLC! 🙂 Yay! Fucking expensive though! :'(

Photos from the weekend are here.

Hate! LANDLORDS!

I HATE THEM ALL!

I found this perfect place in Redondo Beach… I want it, I want it NOW!

But the Landlord is being a jackass! He only checks his voicemail like once a fucking day. He claims hes faxed me the damn application twice, but our fax machine never rings. But when I call the same number I’m giving him, it works just fine.

I want this place, I’m so frustrated with looking at apartments. I’m so over this shit.

I don’t understand why it’s SO FUCKING HARD to PAY PEOPLE MONEY!

I’m ready to write this guy a check for $2,400, why is he being so fucking difficult about it!