Tag: office

Totaly Late

So I’m totaly late for class now… I woke up, out of a very nice dream, to the sound of the phone ringing. I looked around and saw that it was light out, so I looked at my clock….. 9:26. “9:26!! HOLY SHIT! I’M LATE FOR CLASS!” I scream to myself. I look at my watch to make sure that’s the right time…. Then I check my alarms, yep… It’s 9:26 and class starts in a couple minutes, no way to get there on time, unless I leave NOW and speed all the way, I can get there 10 minutes late….. But after smelling my breath and checking the mirror, that option was ruled out.

So I got out of bed, and took a shower, brushed my teeth and now here I am… Totaly late for class. Fucking shit!

I have a program to do, that I don’t understand at all… And I missed the class where she explains what everyone’s been complaining about.. There are no more TA office hours between now and when it’s due. This royally sucks ass. I know what I’m going to be doing tonight, and at work today.

But thought this all, I had been waking up from a great dream…. Nathan Ritchie and I were out shoppig for someone’s birthday. I dunno who’s, but someone was paying us to shop for them. It was totaly cool. So we were out shopping and talking about what’s been going on in our lives, and he came out to me. So we talked about boy-friends and he asked if I had one, and I said yeah…. Later during shopping we ran into Julian and talked to him, three gay computer nerds in one spot, that was funny shit. From there Nathan and I went out to a lake, but it wasn’t any lake around here. It was the one in Lenox. We hung out there, and them my Grandpa and Adam showed up… We all hung out and talked tell Shiela and Beak showed up as well. Then we all went back to my G&G’s house. There my Grandma and other aunt were cooking. And they were feeding some food to Claire (who was sitting on the counter and is a dog). But as soon as Andy gave Katie food, they freaked out about something… That’s about when I woke up. But it was just a really really fucked up dream.

Last night was fun. We went to the GLRC and they all talked while I did homework. It was good times. Afterwards we went to Java Joes and hung out and talked and shit. People all left early, and it was sad, but eh, we had a fun time. Julian was there as well and we got to talk about all kinds of stuff. So it was good. I’m going to his house Thurday to fix some stuff for him.

The weekend was also good. Saturday we watched porn with James tell 3 AM, then Adam and I came to my house and spent the night here. Friday we went to Static which was great, there was this one hot boy…. Trevor, Travis.. I dunno his name, but he was in the white boxer contest and it was HOT! OMG. I wanted to jump on stage and fuck him there… ::fans self::

There were alot of other funny shit that went down Friday night and thoughout the weekend, but I don’t have time to explain it all.

Punch

So today I’ve wanted to punch someone all fucking day long. Gwar. I get to work, I’m working on stuff, Nazanin comes in and asks “Have you done anything to Vermont.”
Me: “Yeah”
Her: “I knew you had something to do with it… Gary’s having a problem.”
Me: “What kind of problem.”
Her: “He can’t send e-mail.”
Me: “What’s the error message.”
Her: “I don’t know.”

Now, have you ever tried solving a problem when you don’t know ANYTHING about the problem. Gwar. So she went on… “Could you look through the logs and see if there’s any problem.”

So I did, went through all the logs minute by minute, for 20 minutes prior. Now I’m guessing you’ve never seen maillog logs, but everyminute on a busy system like ours, it prints between 50 and 100 lines. So I went through them all. And didn’t see a thing… All while she was standing there over my shoulder watching me.

When I told her I didn’t see anything, she said, “There has to be something there.” and proceeded to take the keyboard, while I was still typing on it. And did it herself. Now if she was just going to not accept what I said as the truth, then why the hell did she come in and ask _ME_ to fix it? I had alot of other work to do as well. Bitch.

So after about another 20 minutes of her looking through logs, she didn’t find anything either, so she wondered off to her office, without saying anything.

I, in the meantime, went off and fixed the problem by simply restarting the service that controls the flow of mail through the server. I went back and told her this, and she said. “What were you doing to Vermont.”
Me: “Installing updates.”
Her: “What kind of updates.”
Me: “Printer software, BIND, etc. Nothing that had anything to do with the SMTP server.”
Her: “Well one of those must have caused the problem.”

HOW THE HELL??? They had nothing to DO with the e-mail. Stupid stupid bitch. Why does she pay me to do work if she’s just going to question everything I do? Gwar.

So later in the day… She comes into my office with the vermont log file about a totally different thing and asks what an entry was. I said, “It’s nothing, just that this server couldn’t connect Fantasy to get it’s nightly DNS updates.”
Her: “Oh, well you may think it’s nothing but we have to understand what it means.”

HELLO? Did you not just hear me. I told you what it means! Gwar! Gwar! Gwar! Quadrule GWAR!

Stupid stupid bitch.

What does she have nothing better to do then to sit in her office and read through thousands and thousands of lines of error messages and scrutinize every last one of them? If you want to know so bad, go look it up yourself. It’ll be just what I told you it was, Bitch!

Ok, so around 3:30 she comes into my office. “Gary’s having the same problem, did you do anything with Vermont.”

Why does she automatticaly assume that I caused the problem, there’s HUNDREDS OF MILLIONS of things that could have caused that problem.

I’m just pissy. Stupid bitch.

Adam’s Conversation 2

11:35:41 pischkoa: Hello?

11:35:47 Adam – Sluk: Hi

11:35:54 pischkoa: How are you?

11:36:01 Adam – Sluk: OK

11:36:09 Adam – Sluk: Nervous

11:36:14 pischkoa: Why are you nervous?

11:36:21 Adam – Sluk: About tonight

11:36:34 pischkoa: Oh, the movie thing?? Have you talked to Kim about it yet?

11:37:10 Adam – Sluk: I’m going to cal her in a bit

11:37:14 pischkoa: Ahh.

11:37:49 pischkoa: So what else is up?

11:37:50 Adam – Sluk: Kit called me this morning and said she had a pseudo script and for us to PLEASE change it as we see fit. She was going to email it to me so I got on to check

11:37:59 pischkoa: I see.

11:40:03 pischkoa: You’re mad aren’t you.

11:40:35 Adam – Sluk: A bit yes

11:40:41 pischkoa: Why?

11:43:04 Adam – Sluk: Well yesterday I talked to you, I was really upset but in the end I felt a bit better about the whole situation. Then last night someone downtown asked if you were upset, I asked why and he told me about your away message last night. That’s when I called you.

11:43:04 Adam – Sluk: I wasn

11:43:04 Adam – Sluk: ‘t very happy last night

11:46:50 pischkoa: 1) Who told you about it? 2) I wasn’t very happy last night either, or the night before… Wed night you had to work, after you got off I figured you would at least call em to see if I wanted to do anything for a while, you never did. That made me sad. I cried the whole fucking night, then last night, I was going to go out as well… But you never even asked, you just assumed that I wasn’t, now I’ll give you the fact that I hadn’t been going out, but when I said three times that “I guess I won’t get to see you tonight since you’re already going out with missy” and other things along those lines, and you never even gave it a second chance, you say that it hurts you when you go out without me, but yet you never really seem to make move to try even ask if I wanted to go out. That really upset me, the whole night last night, from the time I left myoffice tell the time I went to bed, there were tears rolling down my face cause I didn’t know what the hell was going on. I didn’t know what the hell you were thinking…. I was upset as hell last night.

11:50:34 Adam – Sluk: You said yourself that you wouldn’t see me on wednesday becasue I worked and on thursday you had a paper to write. As far as I was told you couldn’t do anything. I wanted to. And when you said “I guess I won’t see you tonight…” I took that as you couldn’t do anything. Ou know you’re welcome to go out with me anytime…not even “welcome” but we SHOULD be together whenever we can. You shouldn’t have to be invited. After 6 months it’s just second nature. When we’re free, we’re together

11:51:56 Adam – Sluk: But regardless of misunderstandings between us, saying relationsips suck on AIM for everyone to see…why?

11:53:15 pischkoa: Cause I was pissed off, I was mad, I was upset. Damnit. I was fucking crying my eyes out last night.

11:54:50 Adam – Sluk: And you thought that would help. After hearing about that I had my share of crying too. When I didn’t invite you I didn’t mean anything. History should show you that I simply don’t get your “subtle hints” but you saying that was blatently mean…I don’t care how upset you were that was un called for

11:56:32 pischkoa: Fine, I’m sorry for saying that.

11:56:55 Adam – Sluk: That’s not how this works Chris.

11:57:08 pischkoa: Well then how _does_ it work.

11:59:03 Adam – Sluk: This is silly. It’s not my fault that you can’t go out, you said your self you don’t blame me for it. But yet I get all bad vibes. I feel bad simply for doing anything at all becasue you’re at home or work. I can’t keep track of your schedule any better than you can keep track of mine, especually when we’re apart. There was no reason you couldn

11:59:45 Adam – Sluk: ‘t have said “You want to do something tonight?” and there would have been no problem. But instead you droppped hints that I obviously didn’t pick up on, and you blamn it on me

12:00:55 Adam – Sluk: Then in your anger you say something like that, that I didn’t even see but rather hear about from other people. Thats bull

12:02:04 pischkoa: I’m not blaming shit on you. I’m venting my anger towards you and I’m sorry I’m doing that.

12:02:07 Adam – Sluk: I’ve made every attempt to try and help things, we’ve talked about this, we’ve tried and everytime we come out feeling like we’ve accomplished something yet nothing happens, and more anger incurs, what are we going to? Some sort of scheduling has to take place

12:02:43 Adam – Sluk: If you’re vent ing your anger towards me, then how do I come out being the bad guy?

12:03:40 pischkoa: I don’t know.

12:03:58 Adam – Sluk: you never did…But you never even asked, …and you never even gave it a second chance

12:04:08 Adam – Sluk: And you are blaming me

12:06:58 pischkoa: I don’t know what to say, fine I’m wrong for blaming you, I’m sorry for making you feel bad, I’m sorry for everything and anything I’ve ever said to you to make you feel like shit.

12:08:36 Adam – Sluk: You don’t have to say anything. It’s what you ARE saying that made me mad. I mean the away message had one intention. and it wasn’t one of “hey Just so you know where I am…” like most away messages

12:10:53 Adam – Sluk: During this whole situation, I’ve somehow felt this was my fault, that I was doing something wrong, but the truth was neither of us were to blame. We were in a shitty situation and there was no good way out. I tried to handle everything as best I could, and as did you. But last night was upsetting for both of us because you lost your temper. That can’t be made better by saying “Fine I’m sorry”

12:11:18 pischkoa: I’m sorry for everything, I’ve been through enough in the last two days, enough crying enough wondering if we’re going to be together tomorrow, enough cryng because I don’t know if I’ll have boyfriend whom I dealry love and can’t stand being apart from, over the last two days, you’ve said that you had doubts about our relationshipa nd you wouldn’t tell me what you ment by that. I don’t doubt our relationship, I think that we’re strong, but I just don’t know what to think now, I don’t know what the hell is going on damnit. I don’t mean to hurt you, but when I get hurt, I do what seems like the right thing to do. At the time I felt like that, and I wanted someone to talk to, you weren’t there, I couldn’t talk to you, I put up an away message about my feelings and I left, I went and cried in the shower. Damnit, I’m sorry.

12:11:45 pischkoa: Alright, now you’re blaming this on me. And I don’t like that. I did not lose my temper, I was sad, I was upset, I felt like shit. Don’t dare blam this on me.

12:14:53 Adam – Sluk: OK I’m sorry, but I never doubted us till last night. When my boyfriend, my love, my soul mate says relationshps suck I wonder why he’s in one then. I wa soo scared last night, we left downtown I bawled the whole way telling Missy how sacred I was, how scared I was that you were giving up, that we were falling apart, that I was losing you. I lost you once, volentarily I add, I NEVER want to lose you again. It pains me to be apart from you as it pains you I’m sure, then hearing that when I thought we were on the road to recovery hurts me very deeply. I didn’t know what to think

12:16:57 Adam – Sluk: I though that you were done, I thought “who knows where we’ll be in the next couple days” for the first time since out first break up, I was scared for us. I hated that feeling. I can’t take it. I didn’t sleep last night. I almost came to POlk City at 3 this morning and shaking you and screaming “What’s happening?”

12:18:41 Adam – Sluk: After many a little tiff, 6 months into the relationship we hit this. And since this a first, neither of us know who to deal. But I learned last night, that Julian and Dean had a very similer experience, and they weathered that storn just fine, as I know we will, one way or another

12:20:21 Adam – Sluk: Please say something…

12:20:55 pischkoa: If I were done then I called you back at 11 when you called, if I were done then I would have come to downtown and told you that I was through with you… But I didn’t because I wasn’t done, I don’t want to lose you ever again, I went thgouh it once and these last couple days it’s felt like I’ve lost you again, for me it’s felt that way. That you were already gone. I didn’t know what to think of things last night, I didn’t want to give up. I was going to drive downtown numerous times and tell you, that damnit I wanted to go out last night. I wanted to, and when you called last night, I hoped that maybe you would come over so we could talk about it. But you never did. I was going to drive over there, but I didn’t know how you were feeling or what you were feeling, I thought it the worst and I didn’t want to face that then. I know that we’ll get through this in time, but we HAVE to talk more, you have to be more receptive and think more of me, and I have to tell you more str8 out about what I want and what I’m thinking, we both have our flaws, but that’s the way the world works. We’ll get through it.

12:23:02 Adam – Sluk: I know we will. And I’m not blaming this one you, but I truly think part of this stems from the meds, or lack thereof. We need to work to fix whatever problems yu have.

12:23:27 Adam – Sluk: Because your problems, are our problems

12:23:31 pischkoa: And youneed to work to fix the problems you have as well.

12:23:36 Adam – Sluk: I know.

12:24:15 pischkoa: So are we better now?

12:24:27 Adam – Sluk: Not yet, but we will be…

12:24:37 pischkoa: … What?

12:24:48 Adam – Sluk: We can go somewhere and talk tomorrow after I gte off work

12:25:08 pischkoa: Why not tonight, after the Movie thing.

12:25:36 Adam – Sluk: We can, I think everyone wants to go out after if you want to too. But we can if it would be better

12:25:55 pischkoa: I think it would be better. I can’t stand another night of this shit.

12:26:07 Adam – Sluk: OK. We can go somewhere and talk

12:26:41 Adam – Sluk: Let’s go to nalan plaza and talk. I found last night it’s a good place for thinking.

12:26:49 pischkoa: Fine

12:26:54 Adam – Sluk: No fines

12:27:10 Adam – Sluk: OK works better

12:27:10 pischkoa: I still want to know who told you.

12:27:51 Adam – Sluk: That’s not important. They wern’t trying to cause trouble, they wanted to make sure out fairy tale romance was still ok

12:28:04 pischkoa: I know, but I want to know who it was.

12:28:15 Adam – Sluk: OK…Mike

12:28:32 pischkoa: Ok

12:30:22 Adam – Sluk: So I have to be at the Church at 5 to set up, so are you going to meet us there?

12:30:34 Adam – Sluk: Do you wanna come early and help set up too?

12:30:42 pischkoa: I was planning on meeting you at your house.

12:30:51 Adam – Sluk: What time are you off?

12:30:56 pischkoa: When ever I want to be.

12:31:19 pischkoa: I can leave at 3 if you want, or even 2:30

12:31:19 Adam – Sluk: Ah, well tha works. I didn’t think you got off till 4:30 or something

12:31:41 Adam – Sluk: OK the call me when you get into ANkeny. I should be home, but just in case

12:32:02 Adam – Sluk: Umm if you wanna come earlier that’s cool, but anytime around 4 is cool

12:32:08 pischkoa: Fine

12:32:14 Adam – Sluk: No fines….

12:32:22 Adam – Sluk: : )

12:33:50 pischkoa: What about the Wayne Newton bridge?

12:33:55 pischkoa: Yeah you know, the one they’ll build in 2031 to connect The Las Vegas Islands to the Arizonian mainland?

12:33:57 Adam – Sluk: WHAT?!?!

12:34:19 Adam – Sluk: Adams confused

12:34:32 pischkoa: Nevermind then.

12:34:35 Adam – Sluk: lol

12:34:40 Adam – Sluk: What was that?

12:34:49 pischkoa: It was _supposed_ to be a joke.

12:35:04 Adam – Sluk: It was funny, where’d it come from though?

12:35:14 pischkoa: http://slashdot.org/article.pl?sid=02/06/07/1412217&mode=nested&tid=126&threshold=2

12:35:21 Adam – Sluk: Ah

12:35:44 pischkoa: I have to go work, brb

12:36:22 Adam – Sluk: OK Well I’m going to find something to eat. See you around 3 or 4?

12:37:39 pischkoa: Yeah.

12:37:42 Adam – Sluk: Bye!

12:37:45 Adam – Sluk: I love you!

12:37:51 pischkoa: Bye!. Love you too

12:37:56 Adam – Sluk: *hugs*

12:38:01 Adam – Sluk: *extra hugs*

12:38:04 pischkoa: ::hugs::

12:38:07 pischkoa: :-*

12:38:10 Adam – Sluk: Bye

Adam – Sluk is logged out @ Fri Jun 7 12:43:11 2002.

Pissed Off

Sometimes I don’t know what I want. I love Adam, but he can be just so damn inconsiderate sometimes. I mean, like yesterday, he worked until 8, but never bothered to call me once he got off to see if I wanted to do something, you know that would have been nice if he would have fucking called, I would have gladly gone out for a couple hours, considering I sat around home all night waiting for him to call and get off work so that we could do something, and many times through out the night I got the idea in my head that… Maybe he’s not really working, maybe he just told me that so he could go out with people and not have to come back at 9 and then go back out. I feel as though I’m more of a burden then anything right now. Because he has to come home so early.

Then today, he just assumes that I don’t want to do anything, doesn’t even ask if I was going to be around before he called Missy and goes out with her. Thanks alot Hun..

Sometimes I wonder about them. I know Missy wants to have sex with Adam, I know how much she likes him. I fear that I may loose him. I’m scared about losing him to someone else.

::cries uncontroably in my office::

What’s happeneing in our relationship right now?? Do we want to continue? I don’t know. I know that I do. I love him, or at least that’s what I think this feeling I get when I leave him is love, or is it happyness to be away… I don’t know about that either. I feel as though I love him, I get jelious of him when he goes out with others, I get sad when I can’t see him, but I also get more pissed off when I can’t see him and when I don’t have that feeling of him there.

When he goes out without me, I feel as though he’s out there having fun and here I am stuck doing Hw, I resent him for that. I want him to at least make sacrafice to be around me, you know how much I’ve sat around his house waiting for him to do HW, or waiting for him to mow his yard, or waiting for him in general doing something. I wait because I love him and I’d rather spend that time sitting on his bed watching him do Hw, or messing with his bonsai’s then I’d rather spend out and about with friends….

That’s another thing is that with him spending all the time with our friends, they’re all going to think “Adam’s the fun one” and such like that, just the general contact will do that to them, they’ll forget about me and what I do when we all go out. They all already call him more then they call me. I wonder sometimes if they like me, or if they all just put up with me cause I’m there and they like Adam.

I sit in bed every night that I can’t go out with him crying, because I miss him, because I want to be out there, because… because of everything, I lay in bed crying.

Best Day In a While.

So today has been absolutely great! Chris and I continued to bitch about things, and then we deicded to find a new motherboard for my computer. So we looked and looked. It was a pain in the ass to figure out what kind I needed in the first place. So yeah. We figured it all out and found a replacement Asus for $50, which is great compared to the $395 that HP’s trying to charge for a lower quality one. So that’s cool, perhaps I’ll get it soon. I should put pictures of what my server used to look like and what it looks like now, you’d all be amused. I know I am!

Today at Krell was also the annual board meeting, there were alot of big wigs around the office, people I’ve never seen before. Very odd.

Tonight Adam and I went out to Java Joe’s like normal, we were hanging out when we ran into James from group, he said he was waiting for Mike and low and behold Mike appears, so we hung out with them. It was really fun. We all went back to Mike’s apartment, which is fucking cool, and just hung out there tell 12:00 or so. Great times.

And that’s been my day, night all!