From Steve’s Blog: I must admit, Im in a great mood right now. Yesterday, I took Andrew out on a not-so-adventureous adventure to the mountains. I haven’t been to the mountains in years and I figured Andrew has never been to the so-cal mountains before, so it seemed like it would be fun. One the way there, I had to stop by my house to get some money. Andrew met my mom and Stepfather. It wasn’t really much of a meeting, it was just a meet and greet situation. I got money, grabbed snacks, and we went on our way. I figured all the major mountains would be ridiculously busy (e.g. Lake Arrowhead, Big Bear, etc…), so I opted for a cheaper and closer alternative, Mt. Baldy. The drive up wasn’t that bad; it only took about 45 minutes. As we were approaching Mt. Baldy, I was getting worried as the mountains looked to be barren of snow. Leave it to me to find the one mountain range that didn’t have snow… Anyways, I have a great uncle that lives at the base of the mountain with his family. Andrew and I stopped by his house to say hi and get directions to the mountain village. Side note, my uncle bobby and his family are outrageous and crude usually. But this time, he was pretty low key. I think he was just tired. So, we left and continued towards the snow-less mountain. We went about 15 minutes, away from my uncle’s house and then we saw cars coming back with snow on the hoods. I was sooooo relieved; my date wouldnt be a flop afterall. We kept going higher and higher through mount Baldy and then it started to rain, hail, then snow. I have never seen snow fall and I have also never driven in the snow. I was so nervous, but I tried to contain myself as to not freak out Andrew. We parked the car and started our mini-adventure. It was amazing. The trees were covered in snow and it was white everywhere. sigh. We hiked for a little bit, threw snowballs, made a sordid snow angel, and a stumpy snowman. After those shenanigans,, we hiked to a cliff that overlooked a brook. Watching him catch snowflakes on his tongue made me feel good beyond words. Being there next to him in the snow made me forget about that one weekend. I felt great. I couldn’t help staring at him. It was just amazing to have him hold me and kiss me on that ledge as the snow fell on us. We went back to the car and warmed up, wink wink. We were famished so I tried to find a nice restaurant. We saw a sign for “Top Notch Restaurant-great scenic views and food.” I drove my poor mustang further up the mountain and grimaced through every sharp inclined turn. It turns out, the restaurant was at the top of the mountain; the only way to get there is to pay $25 a person for the ski lifts. So, we left and explored other options. On the way down, we saw a little snack cabin. We walked in and then walked out. It was really shady looking. The snack bar was in someone’s house, weird mountain people’s house… We left the snow and went back to my uncles. He made us sandwiches free of charge and we all watched golf. Oh, my aunt Yolanda (my uncle’s wife) forgot Andrews name and referred to him as “the other one.” God she is adorable, and forgets things easily. After all, she is like 74 years old. We drove back to his room and cuddled for a while and then fell asleep. It was the best nap I’ve ever had.
Category: Not Published
Private: The Weird Stuff
From Andrew’s Blog:Ok, so the weird stuff. A week or two ago my mom told me that she had a phone conversation with Chris, and that he is really sad and whatnot. I don’t know why this made me feel so weird, but it did. Probably because she’s my own mother. But also because I had had a dream that involved my mom and Chris and I told steve and jokingly said that when I talk to my mom, she’ll bring up Chris. And then when I called her, she was like “I have to talk to you about Chris” it was really weird. So that was that really.
But then Steve (if you go to his LJ, you can see elaboration) found out that Chris hung out with one of his exes, and it seems to be getting at him for some reason. But then he wrote that he went to Chris’ journal and read it and looked at pictures of us together, and he wrote that Chris obviously still loves me. So then, of course I’m too curious for my own good, so I broke my promise to myself and went to Chris’ journal and just scanned through it. Several interseting things: 1. I’m not sure what Steve was talking about, b/c I barely found references to me, and most of them weren’t too positive, 2. it seems as Chris has become some sort of so-cal homo, going to clubs and drinking a lot, which is just strange cause it’s so not him, and 3. from the looks of my skimming, it seemed like Chris was also in some fairly awful relationships. I don’t know why, but the whole situation has been on my mind now. So I don’t really know. It was really weird being back to Chris’ website after not going there for so long. I used to go there a million times a day. It still felt.. familiar.
I really want to call him and talk to him about this shit. I still want to be friends with him. He’s the one who ended it all. God damnit.
Private: Don’t Mess With Me
Ugh, the last day or so have been HORRIBLE.
Ok, well you might all remember a while back I complained about my insurance and the doctors and how they were trying to bill me for the pre-consultation, and blah blah blah? Well I got ANOTHER Bill from them yesterday. Now they are saying they NEVER were a part of the PPO plan that we have and it was a mistake to even say they were.
Yes, it WAS a mistake, it was THEIR mistake and I should NOT HAVE TO PAY FOR THIS. Apparently what happened was that they were a part of ADMAR, which was recently bought out by Multiplan PPO. Of course I couldn’t get ANY of this information out of the Doctor, they were just trying to get me to pay the damn bill.
So I went off on this stupid bitch. It’s not MY FAULT that they told me TWICE that they were a part of the plan and it’s not MY FAULT that the damn website for the plan provider says that they ARE PARTICIPATING. I should NOT HAVE TO PAY because they fucked up.
Then yesterday when I got home there was a fucking car parked in my spot. I let them sit there for an hour, but then I got pissed and had them towed.
Then this morning my alarm clock doesn’t go off so I’m running an hour late, and I had this interview at 7:15 and shit. So I’m driving and come up behind this car and slow down. Then he moves over and I pass him and he’s like flipping me off and yelling at me and shit. So I’m like, “What the fuck is this guys problem”. I did NOTHING to him.
So I flip him off and roll down my window and I’m like, “WHAT THE FUCK IS YOUR PROBLEM FUCKER”. Then he starts all racing me and shit and keeps cutting me off and then coming up next to me and flipping me off. So I call the cops on his bitch ass. I’m sure they’ll not do anything about it, but whatever. It made me feel better to do something.
Get to work and get on my call for the interview. It went really well and it sounds like a great job. You get 4 weeks a year as vacation, and all this shit. They said they want to fly me out to Chicago for an in person interview. So that’s exciting! They’re going to get back to me by the end of the week with more information. 🙂
The only problem is that they seem to be very windows oriented. Although they are a majority of Macs (Over 400) the guy said he would prefer to move to windows. Blah.
Ugh, lets hope the rest of the week goes better then this shit.
How I Miss Him.
God.. You know, the week has been going really well. But yet, I still miss him so much.
I miss his calling me every day to just chat. I miss his showing up at my front door and just letting himself in. I miss just laying in his bed or my bed watching movies and cuddling.
I miss our conversations and our going out and doing things.
I miss having him sleep over and just being there.
I know he caused a lot of problems… But I still miss him, we had a lot of really great times too.
What happened to “We’re psydo-boyfriends already” and “I could just sleep here every night” and all that? What changed so much. :'( Why can’t we even talk any more.
Off to my day of work. Adios!
Private: It’s Just a Candy Bar
So lets see, I haven’t SEEN Austin in almost 2 weeks now. We had another huge fight on wed about shit. He blocked me on AIm saying it’s not Condusive to our friendship. So then I called him to talk about what the fuck was going on. He says he wants to be friends with me and all this shit, but when I try to talk to him about anything he’s always just like. “I don’t want to talk about that right now” blah blah blah. It’s so annoying.
During the call he tried to tell me that I was obsessing about this and etc. I told him off on that. I mean in the last like 2 weeks, I haven’t ONCE dialed his number, I haven’t ONCE called him to say, “Do you want to do something” and I haven’t ONCE started a converstation with him on AIM. It’s all been him. And hello, who calls me every day, sometimes WAY more then once a day. That’s right, it’s HIM! He’s the one being obsessive about this whole thing. Whatever.
So the called ended with, “Well I’ll call you when I want to hang out again”. He called me this morning asking if I wanted to go out with him and some Bako Friend. I told him NO. Looks like I probably won’t get to see him at all for his birthday. Good thing too, cause I just ordered his present online today.
There’s something about March too, even though I have a VERY small group of friends, there’s been at least 2 birthdays a week!
I’ve sent in my application to be a Campmaster for the Los Flores and Lost Forest camps here in the OC. The programs they have look amazing and it’s totally what I would want to do. I’d be able to help out nearly every weekend, so that’d be sweet. I was also looking online and there’s a position open in the District for a Webelos-To-Scout commisioner. Based on the job description they had up, it looks like this person is basically in charge of getting kids to stay in between the Weblos to Scouts transition. As that is where most of the lose happens.
I think I would LOVE that job. I have tons of ideas about things to do, and being a former Eagle Bound Director it’s right up the alley of what I’ve done in the past.
After sending those in I went and read up on all the posts from when I was working at camp… God it makes me miss it so much!
So yeah, hopefully something will come of that. the first thing they have is in early May though. Then there’s a training in the last part of June that I have to go to. I’m really excited for this.
It seems as though in the last two-three weeks though my “friends” here have just kinda popped up. I’ve now got Joel, Jon, Patrick, Robert, Perry, and Tony… Though they are all very new, I’m hoping that things will not get all fucked up again. Perry and I already have a date for Lunch on Monday (not a date date, but just a hang out date). Tonight I’m going out with Jon, Joel and Robert. I kind of want to invite Patrick again, but I’m not sure he would fit with this group of people. Perhaps I shall call Michael since I haven’t talked to him in forever.
So life over all isn’t looking too bad, of course I’m still pissed about this whole Austin thing turning out so crappy. But I’m getting over that shit.
I had a long talk about this with my therapist on Wed. We talked and talked and talked, and actually worked this issue back to something that happened when I was like 6 or 7 years old… (Well not JUST this issue, but my issue with wanting people to like me so much). Basically want I do is find someone who’s going to be a challenge to get to like me and work my ass off to make them like me. He says it stems from working with my dad who never really said “Good Job”. Must more complicated then that. But yea.
I actually broke down crying at his office, we did this thing where I just relaxed and we talked and it came up to this time when I stole a candy bar from the store and my parents FLIPPED out! So yeah.
I guess that’s it, adios!