EVENTFUL EVENTFUL!!!!

So yeah this weekend has been indeed, very eventful.

I will probably write most of what happened in the public one. But there are a few thigns I want to touch on here.

Ok so Thursday night. I was kinda surprised that Chris actually drank. But I knew he wanted to get drunk. He was so funny, and I’m glad he had a good tiem. Though I guess he was a bit upset by underage drinking which was everyone else except him. But he said it wasn’t too big of ad eal so I just kinda dropped it. Anyways, I was kinda drunk and apparently UBER horny. I was talking really dirty to Chris, and I think he liked that too. He alluded to it later, so . yeah. Anyways, I kept saying how much I wanted to have sex and blah blah blah Im sure I made no sense and just sounded stupid. Anyways I finally convinced him to. So we were trying with just wetness and that didn’t really work so he went and got some lotion from the bathroom. Lubed it up and things went swell.

He was on top and then we did it doggy style which I thought was really hot, plus it was hot to begin with since it was so scandalous. Eventually I had to cum and I just came inside him and it felt really good and I hope it did for him too. So that was that. Then I jacked him off and he came and then we went to bed. Woke up like an hour later and Jaime was up and getting ready. So eventually we rolled outta bed and that was all good. The rest will be on public.

Let’s see what’s next for privateness….? Well the next morning we were at his apt. and started messing around again. My sis said she would be there in 10 minutes so for some reason we thought it would be a smart idea to try and squeeze in a quickie. So yeah, we did. But then she called so we just decided to jack it real quick, so we did and both came in like 2 minutes. Very hot and scandalous. but fun as well. Next up on privates…..

We had a fight Friday night. I would callt aht our first real fight. He was mad b/c I was a bitch in the car and then happy when we got to bowling so he thought it was something he did and got all upset. We kinda yelled at each other on the way home and that was sad b/c I didn’t like fighting with him. But it wasn’t really a big deal every couple has their fights. That night, when we got back to my house, something just snapped in me and I just started crying and I could’t really control myself. So we layed in bed and Chris held me and comforted me and I just sobbed. Yeah, I really don’t know why. I was just stressed and then with us fighting and stuff it was too much for me. But I’m ok now!

I guess the next thing to private update about is tonight. We had a really good day (ended up making love again) and we were laying in bed and somehow it came up that it would be the last time that I would be in Ames.

Brian Kinney 86: u have any naked ones
Auto response from SqUaLL0112: Packing up my room.. *sniff sniff*….
Brian Kinney 86: or a webcam
SqUaLL0112: no, i have a boyfriend
SqUaLL0112: im not sure hed want me webcamming with another guy
Brian Kinney 86: shhh
SqUaLL0112: whats that mean?
Brian Kinney 86: dont tell him
SqUaLL0112: well considering i really care about him, and hes a really great guy, my vote is no

Sorry that was random, but what a fuckface! Don’t tell him my ass! Why are some people so stupid.

Anyways, so the me being last night in Ames thing really upset Chris and he started crying. So I held him and said everything would be alright. I was trying to put him in a better mood, and I think I did, at least partially by talking about how if he was fat, he’d just have to jiggle his belly and I’d fly off and other crazyness. I hope it at least made him smile. Anyways, of course my tears were coming a little bit. I thought about abandoning myself and just letting loose, but I kept it inside. However, now I do feel like crying. We also decided that we are gonna have “the talk” on Wednesday about what’s gonna happen. I just want to have it before we go to NJ/CA. It would be better that way.

Anyways, lots more kisses and talking and a litle more crying and we ended up at the door. I forget how it came up, but Chris said that he took down the pics of me b/c it was too much for him to see. So I told him that the reason the the pics were even up was to remember the happy times, and not the sad. And then he started crying again, and I was upset too. He said he took them down last night when he was up b/c they made him too sad. I was sad about that, I hope he puts them back up.

After I left, I thought I had better do something nice for him, I really thought he just needed me to show him I care. So with my quick thinking, I popped over to Hy-Vee, tried to get roses but the stupid bitch working wasn’t there, so I just grabbed some carnations, waited in line forever, and drove back over to his house. I knocked on the door and jumped up the stairs so he wouldn’t see me in the peep hole cause I know he always looks! So then I jumped down and gave them to him, and he seemed pretty surprised. I spent 10 or so minutes there, and we put them in a cup and stuff and I hope he enjoyed them. He seemed pretty thankful and told me how much he loved me 🙂

Hopefully he is feeling better aboutt hings already.

Well I think that’s about it for privates. If there is anything else, I will be sure to note. Now on to public!

One More Week…

What a LONG weekend… But very very good.

This update is going to be really long… (Everyone ready?)

Today…

Ok, first I’d like to complain about this morning so far. I got up late and came into work late, mostly because I’m only working 8 hours a day this week, because I’m not taking any days off, so yeah. No need to work 10 hours and have a whole day off or anything.

Well over the weekend Barb had opened an attachment with a virus, so I had to take care of that first thing this morning… Luckily I couldn’t sleep Saturday night (more on this later) and had sent her instructions as to what to do. So when I got here she was already taking care of that. Not that big of a deal really.

So I came into my office and was doing my normal stuff, then Nazanin comes in and she’s like, “What’s the Vermont Password.” and I’m like, “It’s the same it’s been for months now.” And then she’s like, “Well I can’t log in.”

Grrr, she’s just so stupid. So then I tell her the password, and she’s like, “It’s supposed to be 3’s and not E’s”.

Now, I don’t remember if I bitched about it when it was all happening, but I WANTED the 3’s and she insisted on the E’s in the password. So then she get’s all bitchy about it and goes literaly grabs my keyboard and changes it herself.

Then she’s like, “Gary’s having e-mail problems.” So I had to sit here and fix that while she stood over my shoulder. I really hate when she does that. Anyways, fixed that then she’s like, “Is there going to be a good fix for this soon.”

At this point I was already wanting to slap her, because I haven’t beem sleeping well, I’m tried, cranky and very bitchy… So with her asking that I just wanted to drop kick her out of my office. So I tell her YET AGAIN, that as soon as Barb goes through this list of accounts that I have that need to be deleted, we can switch over to Axiom, which has EVERYTHING she wants changed, changed.

Grrr.

Anyways, now off to start the weekend… Which was probably one of the most fun and also saddest weekends I’ve had in a LONG time!

Thursday…

Thursday night Andrew came up, and I knew that he’d be hungry by the time that he got here, so I made the Hamburger Helper that I’ve had in my apartment forever. I don’t really like it, and it’s too much for me to eat at once, so I thought it’d be a good time to get rid of it. I also made a peanut pie so that he could try that.

He got here and supper was just getting done, so we hugged and talked for a few minutes then ate supper. After we ate Jamie and Bryce called and asked if we wanted to go over there for a while to hang out and have a few beers. I was like, “Sure, why not.” Though I didn’t think we’d actually drink too much “beer” since I don’t like it. I figured Andrew and I would go over, have a good time and they would drink.

Well we get there and we hung around talking some. Bryce has a SWEET ass apartment. I really wish mine were that nice! Perhaps he can come decorate for me! lol. After a while, Bryce asked us what we wanted to drink and then proceeded to open this thing with like 8 million bottles of hard alcohol. So we drank, everything that he made was UBER yummy. I’ll have to find out what exactly he was making. The last drink we had wasn’t so good though, but I think it’s because it wasn’t mixed quite as well.

So we all got drunk and played card games and had a really good time. Andrew and I spent the night there.

Friday…

We got up Friday morning and ate Breakfast with Bryce… Who is a very good cook based on his breakfast! lol. Also watched the Nanny while we were eating. Very amusing show. After breakfast Andrew and I broke and went back to my place and showered and waited tell Jamie got off work.

Jamie got there and I left to go to my Doctors appointment, and Andrew and her went off to start moving.

Doctors appointment was good, though I think the eye doctor would be the scariest place for a small child. I mean I think out of all the doctors they have the most weird looking crazy ass machines in their office!

After the appoitnment I hurried over to Jamie’s new appartment and helped them unpack. Once we were done with that we went back, got another load and then came back and unpacked that as well. Jim’s plan was really late, so Bryce called some hick that he works with and we got a truck. Went and packed some of the big dressers and stuff and hauled that back to the appartnemt.

That was DRAMA! The tailgate on the truck doesn’t stay up, so I had to sit in the back of the truck and hold the tailgate up so that stuff wouldn’t fall out, and I had to hold up this big tall dresser so that when he turned it wouldn’t fall over! Now this doesn’t seem like that big of a deal, but the appartment and the storage unit were on complete OPPOSITES of the city! And we had to take a gravel road, and cruvy windy roads, the Bryce kept jerking the truck, and it was just drama.

Luckily the second trip that we made didn’t require someone to sit in the back of the truck!

Once we were done with all that, Andrew and I broke and went back to Waukee to hang out with Girls…

That was even more drama. First off, I knew that Courtney didn’t really WANT me there, she was just putting up with me being there, so that upset me. And then I just felt really out of place, and I could tell that Andrew was getting annoyed with a few things, and yeah. We went off to Gray’s lake and they made Andrew drive because there was a “Wasp in Courtney’s car”. I swear that girl will do anything to get out of driving somewhere. Much more drama at Gray’s lake, and then went bowling. I really didn’t want to go bowling, and I figured that I could just sit there and have a good time watching them bowl, etc. Which is what I usually do when I go bowling.

Ride there Andrew was fairly bitchy to me, which put me in an even worse mood then I already was. It’s understandable that he was upset with the girls, but it just hurt me that he was as bitchy to me as he was. Got to the bowling alley and I was forced to bowl. Which pissed me off even more!

I would have to say that that’s the first time in months that I’ve been actually pissed pissed off. To the point where I just sit and don’t talk to anyone. Which is usually the best thing for me tell I calm down because I would usually end up saying something to hurt feelings.

Ride home there was a bit of a fight between Andrew and I. I will have to admit that it was what I would consider to be our first fight. Very sad that it had to happen and even sadder that it happened so close to his leaving.

Anyways, we got home and made up. Which was good, because I hate being mad at people, and I HATE having people made at me!

While Andrew was getting ready to go to bed he kinda had a break down and started crying. I felt bad that all I could do was hold him. I really wish there would have been more to do. Though I think we’ll both need that a lot over the next week to two weeks. I think for me this week will be the worst, because I think about things in the “It’s the last time we’ll…” Type stuff. You know.

Anyways we went to bed, and I slept really well.

Saturday…

Got up Saturday morning and he went to work. I stayed at his house just doing random stuff. I watched a movie, which was really good and made him some lunch for that day and so that he would have stuff to take to lunch this week.

He FINALLY got home at 2:30 and we ate lunch and the stupid realator came and was a bitch, and she was really stupid too, not very good at her job, I don’t think.

After that we broke and drove up to Ames, met up with his sister and family and the like. And went out to dinner. I thought his dad was very rude towards him and his sister. He hardly said a word to either of them. He talked to Bryce 90% of the time, and I would have to say that he said more to me, minus things regarding Andrew’s college tution, then he did to Andrew. Just very rude and Andrew seemed to be fairly upset. Dinner was really good though, and it was nice of him to pay!

Went back to Jamie’s and watched a movie, which didn’t get over tell like midnight. Andrew and I broke as the credits were rolling and came back to my place. He played a few video games and then we went to bed.

Sunday…

We got up Sunday morning fairly early, but it was also semi sleeping in. I was still UBER tired though because I just couldn’t sleep Saturday night. I don’t know why. Well, I have an idea that I was just way to upset about everything to be able to sleep. So I spend from about 1AM tell about 4:30AM just sitting in my living room, reading, watching TV, and taking down pictures. I also went for a walk… But it was a bit cold, so it was short. lol.

I took down all my pics on the wall that I had because they were just upsetting me too much. Everytime I looked at them, al I could think about is how sad it’s going to be once he’s gone and how much I’m going to miss him. I looked at them and though of all the happy, great times that we’ve had together. And then cried because we’re not going to have any more of them. They’ll go back up, probably pretty soon. I can’t stand the bare wall either.

About 4:30 I went back into bed and Andrew was practically sitting up. I thought that he was awake, but later on he stated that he wasn’t. I laid in bed next to him and kissed him, and then we layed there cuddling. (All while he claims he was sleeping) I think I finally got to sleep about 5 or 5:30.

We got up, showered and then headed back to Jamie’s to have breakfast with his dad… Again hardly a word was spoken. Though more then the night before… I’m guessing that’s because Bryce wasn’t there for his dad to talk too.

Also, who knew they made low-fat suasage, and bakon… Crazyness if you ask me!

After breakfast we all went to Reiman Gardens, which was nice, though very sad for me. One of the MANY things on my list of stuff I wanted to do one last time before Andrew left was to go there and hang out, like we did the month before we started dating. More on the list later.

Once we were done with Reiman, Andrew and I split from his fam and went to the Mall to look for glasses for me. Looked at some really good ones, though Andrew wasn’t much of a help because he kept saying that like every pair looked good on me. I need someone that’s going to be critical of them. I liked the girl that worked there and we narrowed it down to one set. Now I just have to find out how much my mom’s really willing to pay for glasses because she said “$150” but the frames alone are that much! And the lenses are another $150 because of my prescription! And there’s no way that I’m going to pay for that shit!

I really don’t understand why she won’t just pay for my contacts, it’d be MUCH cheaper for her.

After that we underwear hunting, for guess who… ANDREW! lol.

From there back to my place where we spent the rest of the night laying in bed, and I spent a large portion of it crying. I don’t really know what came over me, but I just couldn’t hold back the tears anymore. I let a lot of them flow, but still not the full amount. I always feel so stupid crying infront of someone.

He left about 7:15ish, and I went and watched TV.

After a while, I hear a knock on my door and I’m like.. “Who the hell would that be.” So I went and looked out the peep hole, and there wans’t anyone there, so I started to head back to the couch, but I decided that I had better answer it. So I opened the door and out popped Andrew with a big thing of flowers and a cute card! I was so touched, it was so very nice of him! We talked for a bit more and then he left.

I spent the rest of the night on the verge of tears, watching TV, and listening to Music trying to make myself a mix CD. Andrew called and we talked for like an hour as well.

Didn’t sleep well… That’s a shock, really.

Randomness…

My e-bay thing is doing really well, so far it’s up to $97 from $49, and there’s been 262 people that have visisted it! How cool is that! I just hope my other things will sell as well.

The list… I have this big list, though most of it I can never remember. I really wanted to get so much more done this summer then we had time to do. And now we’re down to the last week. He already has so much planned for himself on almost every night. Though I’m going down on Wed, perhaps we can do some of it that night. This weekend we have PACKED to the brim with things to do…

State Fair
Spaghetti Works
One Last Night Downtown
One Last Drag Show
And other stuff that I have written down in my car.

One other thing that I really wanted to do was get a surprise party for him, but that’s been ruined now.

I seem to recall there being something else I wanted to talk about here, but now I can’t remember it!

Oh, we saw Jackson at Gray’s lake Friday night… I didn’t realize it was him though tell we had already walked past each other… How crazy is that though!

Now I’m done, and there’s a box of Sandia garb… Must go raid!

Laters!

Ok I just went and read Chris’ thing about the gut feeling.

I am feeling pretty pissed.

Apparently he got annoyed b/c I didn’t come up after hanging out w/ Court and Ann H. The reason it makes me mad is b/c 1. If you think someone might do something sweet, and then they don’t that is no reason to get mad. If I was hoping that Chris might one day come with flowers or a card or surprise me at work or something and then he didn’t, I wouldn’t be mad about it, b/c it was never concrete, just all in my head. AND I didn’t even get back to my car till almost 10. I would’ve gotten to Ames at 11, and gone straight to bed b/c I would’ve had to wake up early and go to work. So I would’ve just wasted my gas and money, I wouldn’t even of gotten to talk to Chris.

He’s been not himself recently and it’s starting to bother me. He’s being very vague about a lot of things and seems very unwilling to talk about anything. I don’t know what’s going to happen if the communication lines don’t start opening up soon. He says on his journal that there are other things that have been annoying him lately, but of course he doesn’t tell me waht they are. When things are bothering me, he always makes me tell him and we work it out. But now that he’s annoyed about something, I don’t get the right to know. Whatever.

I’m just mad.

Ok here is a private update, though it won’t be too good of one. The only thing I really have to update about is that Chris and I made love again.

It was really nice. It happened early Sunday morning. I said I wanted to, and he had brought along condoms and lube, so we did. I felt a lot better doing it with the condom, it just set my mind at ease, so that was good. It was a lot sweatier than last time lol. I was really hot, and we did it for a pretty long time. Hopefully it was enjoyable for him, it was good for me. Eventually we came and that was done, and we went and definitely showered b/c we were both uber sweaty and gross. But, it was very nice to share that with him again 🙂 Happy!

He spent the night last night. That was good, except I feel bad that he drove all the way here for us to be with each other for like 3 hours and then go to bed. Plus, he got mad about the whole Courtney thing. Which is understandable but he takes it way too personally. But it doesn’t really matter, I don’t really need people fighting right now. But he did say that he wanted to call Courtney and have her help him organize everyone to say goodbye to me type thing. And I feel bad that now he won’t… especially b/c that would’ve been an UBER sweet surprise and I would’ve just died!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! But oh well I guess. I’m sure things will work out. Other than that, not much going on. He left early this morning to go to work, and now Im just killing the next hour until I go.

Mental note: I think tonight I want to have the what’s happening next year talk. Mainly b/c I don’t want to put it off until we actually go on the trip b/c then there could be negative feelings and I want the trip we have to be uber fun and really special. So taht’s that.

Off to play some video games and eat… IM STARVING!

Lots To Do.

So here it is Thursday and I finally have lots to do here at work. Though I don’t think it’ll take to long to get it done.

Yesterday was alright, very boring day at work, so I spent most of it playing Earthbound. I made it past the first guy, and got to the big foot thing. Now I’m in the second town and buying/selling eggs for a $98 profit, so that way I can get lots of money! Now, if only getting money were that easy in real life!

After work, I went home, packed up real quick and then drove to Andrew’s house.

Got there and we talked a bit. I got really pissed off. Not at him but at Courtney. Andrew and the “girls” are going out Friday and Courtney pretty much said that she didn’t want me there. I find this very very annoying, because I don’t know what the hell I did to her to make her not like me. Everytime that her and Andrew hang out she makes the point that she doesn’t want me to be there.

And on top of it all, she knows that Fri/Sat/Sun are days that I’m in town, and that Andrew and I hang out. If you ask me, if you want to go out with one of us on those three days, then you should expect the other to come. It’s not like there isn’t the rest of the weekdays to go out, etc.

I just don’t see why, I mean it’s only a couple hours. Blah whatever….

And you know what, Andrew always complained about how his Bf’s never liked his friends… Well now he’s got a bf who DOES like his friends, but his freinds don’t like his BF.

Anyways, after that we drove to Best Buy, he got a CD player and a CD case. I got a game controller for my computer. How exciting!

From there back to his house where we played games. I tried my hand at Donkey Kong for the N64. I sucked at it, and was getting very mad because he kept making fun of me and my not being able to figure things out. It was my first EVER time playing a game like that, 3-D and all, and where you had to controll the angle of the camera. That on top of the fact that I had no IDEA what buttons were what, how could you expect me to do well my first time. By the time that I finally gave up, I had gotten it down some though.

Went to bed after that, I slept well finally. Which is good.

Got up early this morning, showered, and then headed off to work. Which is where I am now.

Getting here though was very stressfull. The interstate was at a STAND STILL from Hickman all the way back to 86th Street. VERY annoying.

Andrew’s coming up tonight and tomorrow we’re helping his sister move. I’m also getting an eye-doc appoitnment. GOod times.

Anyways, I’m out. Though I had a lot more to bitch about. I have to work.

Oh And Be Careful Out There On Kazaa!