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July 2, 2001 #2

july 2, #2 [dropkick murphys, "amazing grace"] ok well we’ll see

how this goes and how well i keep my concentration. yesterday was pretty good.

i went into work about 9:45 so i oculd fill out the papers and such, but she

didn’t have any copies. so i just went to work. i tried clocking in and it

said "this employee has been terminated" and it wouldn’t let me

clock in. damn thing, so i just wrote down my hours. they better have it fixed

by today. i worked, it was work. i was with mandy, brad and sylena most of

the day. they were ok. mandy was getting to me though cause i would keep trying

to explain something to her about how it’s supposed to be done based on what

the home office says, and she just wouldn’t even listen to me, she’d get all

bitchy, and it’s like, yes mandy i realize that different managers do things

differently. but even though you’ve been here longer in the short run of things,

i’ve been here longer in the long run of things. and i know how the store

is supposed to be run, and what is supposed to be done. so yeah, we just stayed

out of each other hair for most of the day. then at 2 sylena and brad left,

so it was just me and mandy. nic and cat were supposed to be in at 3 and mandy

and i were supposed to be off at 5, but cat didn’t show up and nic had just

crossed his hours off and not told anyone and hand’t found anyone to work

for him, so mandy and i were stuck working a 13 and 11 hours shifts, repectivly.

that was not fun. about 9 adam and julian came and got me from work and we

went out. that was fun. i wasn’t in the best of moods last night, but i had

fun. i enjoy being out with people, even when i’m not in a good mood. but

yeah. i dunno. it’s just people have been getting to me lately. like when

i see some cute guy, i’ll say "oh hello" or something like that

and i’ll point him out or something. but ya know that’s as far as it goes.

it’s like hello, cute guy, bubye cute guy, it’s not like i remember them and

obsess over them or anything. but people have been really big jerks about

it lately. like they make comments that all i want is sex and that’s so not

true. what i want now is a bf. i don’t want anything else. sex is millions

of miles down the road. i want someone that’s there that i can talk to, someone

that i can hold thier hand when i go out, someone that i can bring home and

say "hey mom, dad, this is my bf, deal" lol, but really. it’s starting

to get to me how they do that, the whole thing when i point out guys. and

then there’s the whole thing about adam too. i mean i like adam, he’s cute,

he’s funny, he’s what i would want in a bf. but right now we’re just friends.

we hang out. and people have been blowing it way out of porportion. like the

other night when justin was here. i kept wanting to go to the loop, and everyone was like, yeah so you can see adam, and it’s like NO damnit. i want to go

to the loop cause i enjoy hanging out down there, i might not know many people,

but in case you hadn’t noticed, i like to just hang there and watch people.

i don’t get in the conversation i watch it. i watch it develop, i watch where

it’s going, i just watch it and i watch the people. how they act, etc. if

i feel that i have something that will benifit the conversation i’ll interject

it. most of the time i do have something though and i just keep it to myself,

but yeah. i mean. grr. i like adam, i really do like him. but he’s just a

friend and that’s all it’ll be. and people need to realize that.

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