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Private: The Convo….

Austin: Hey chris waddup? Its me austin

Me: hi?

Austin: Hi! I asked wassup?

Me: hanging with the boy.. you?

Me: So why are you contacting me after more then a month?

Austin: Howve you been? What’s new?

Me: I have been excellent… And yourself?

Austin: I been good

Me: Good to hear, so why are you contacting me now?

Austin: Met ur friends at the boom. thought i’d drop a hello. are you better now?

Me: What do you mean, am I better now?

Austin: Are we cool to be friends?

Me: You are the one who said… “I will call you when I want to hang out” and then never called. You are the one who blocked me on AIM. You are the one who didn’t reply to me when I tried wishing you a happy birthday. So you tell me?

Austin: Is that a no

Me:I never stopped wanting to be… You are the one who cut me out. You need to realize when people want to be your friend and treat them like that.

Austin: I said no more IMing.. because it was getting to be too much to deal with

Me: to much? you are just an idiot who doesn’t understand what a friendship means. Clearly you still haven’t learned.

Austin: Ok then thanks for answering my question.

Me: Learn how to treat your friends and then you can talk.

Austin: This idiot won’t bother you anymore

NextDay:

Austin: Let’s just get along… WE both did things that pissed each other off.

Me: Um. What exactly did I do?

Austin: Look if you wanna be friends its yes or no. We can continue to being like this, but I think it’s stupid.

Me: Austin, you cut me off suddenly with no reson. Now all of a sudden you want to be friends again? I want to know why?

Austin: Omg, you could have called me anytime, but you never did. All i said was I was tired of fighting online. I wanna be friends because….Without the drama, there were times that we got along and had fun.

Me: I didn’t call because you said YOU would call me. Yes, there were lots of fun times… So we can try friends again, but the first time you start putting me down again, I am gone. I don’t need you telling me I’m boring and such a horrible person.

Ok, so yes. I did get a little rude there at the end, but I’m sorry. He was taking literaly 12 hours to reply to each thing, and I was sick of it. What the fuck did he want.

Like I said, he cut ME out. I have no reason to want to be his friend again right now.

Big Fucking NEWS!

OMG OMG OMG!

So…. Last week I interviewed for this job as a Systems Administrator at a non-profit in Chicago… Well I got the following e-mail yesterday JUST as I was leaving work:

….After a thorough selection process we awarded the position to another applicant. However, we were very impressed with your interview. We do have another position that we think you may be interested in (it also pays more). If you are interested in applying, please contact me so we can arrange to fly you out here to interview for this position.

OMG! So at first I was like, well it’s probably just for like a help desk job. But then it was like, why would that pay more?! So I open up the attachement and it says:

Director of Information Systems

Yes, that’s right. It says “DIRECTOR OF INFORMATION SYSTEMS”! I feel so unqualified for the position and I’m like, do they realize I’m only 24… In my first interview for the other job, I had said that in 5 years I see myself being the director. And I’ve always wanted to be the director for a non-profit… I never thought I’d even be making it to the interview level at just 24 years old! This is so exciting. I e-mailed them back this morning accepting the interview offer. Now to wait and see when I’m going to Chicago.

But… On the other hand.. As much as I have complained about it in the past, I’m starting to like SoCal. I’m making friends, I’m having a good time and if I move up to Huntington, I think I’ll be liking it even more!

OMG.. I just got an e-mail. They want me to fly out on WED! And SHIT three people from the Ops Team already have Thursday and Friday off! OMG. What am I going to do!?!

Last night was great. Dinner with “The Boys”. Tonight should be amazing as well. Gah, so much stress! I’m out.

Private: A Bitchy Entry

Ok, this post is all about bitching about work…

So here goes! First, our Project manager is an idiot. He gets paid 100k+ per year, and doesn’t do shit. He sits in his damn office and tasks come in, he doesn’t assign them right, he doesn’t date them right. He doesn’t do shit! I could freaking do his job a ton better then he does.

Second, there are people here who complain that they are so busy and blah blah blah, but yet they don’t really seemt to do anything. Everytime I see them they are playing games or sitting around talking or something stupid like that. Now, I know we have down time while waiting for other people. But comon this guy has freaking tasks that have been sitting around for months where all he has to do is click the “resolved” button. Or tasks that have been sitting there and all he has to do is something that’ll take 10 minutes.

It’s so frustrating, specially when I’m stuck sitting here WAITING for these people to do something.

Grrr. Then we’ve got people who doesn’t fill out thier timesheets liket hey are supposed to. It’s like, comon people that takes 10 minutes a WEEK to do. It’s not that hard.

I think I’m going to stop going to the Doc. I really don’t feel like it’s needed any more. Who knows.

I’ve been working on this ETL task all freaking day. For some reason it doesn’t seem to know what toInitCaps() is. Even though it’s IN THE FUNCTION LIST. And secondly I’m telling it to insert a row where one of the values is 25, but it keeps inserting 14! And I can’t find out where it’s doing that at! Very very annoying.

Granted I copied and pasted it from another ETL task that IS inserting 14… But, I changed it to insert 25 in the only place I can find it doing that at. Grrr. I just don’t know any more.

I’m out yall.

Private: Dreams…

So lets see… Lets talk all about Jon first. So, things have been going good. Although we don’t really seem to connect very well. Perhaps, that’s because I’m too damn affraid to even talk to him. I dunno. I’m just whenever I’m around him so nervous to actually talk directly at/with him. It’s very wierd. Like I like him and all this, but maybe I’m just affraid to get attached again and then be hurt. It’s kinda soon after Austin still.

Last night I did have a really good dream about him… It was pretty hot. Lets just say there was sex involved. 🙂

I also woke up at 3:30 this morning and couldn’t get back to sleep. It was very annoying.

Private: The first time my boyfriend and I had sex, it was because of Golden Girls.

Wow, so the last day has been really really strange.

First I post that thing about what Andrew wrote in his journal. I forgot that he was still on my friends list. So he sent me the following e-mail:

You don’t have to be afraid to talk to me. Ever since Steve’s journal and then going and reading your journal I’ve just about been out of my mind.

And the reason you couldn’t find Steve’s thing is because he deleted it shortly after he wrote it. I just happened to see it in like the hour that it was up.

To which I replied:

Thanks for e-mailing me.

I’m not really afraid to talk to you, just that since you’ve been back. I had tried calling you a few times (and no, not the drunk times) and you never returned my calls. I figured that meant you didn’t want to talk to me. Then after the drunk call and your refusal to respond to that I figured it really was the end and time to leave it alone.

Why have you been out of your mind? And who was it that I went out with that’s an Ex, just curios, if it bothers him that much I’ll not do it again.

And you’re right, #2 is not me. There’s been a lot of changes for the worse since Austin, I’m working on changing those now.

Then he said:

Well, I don’t recall getting any phone calls since I’ve been back. And if my phone has been off, I haven’t gotten any messages.

I’ve been out of my mind b/c of the stuff I read. I found myself jealous when reading about your sleeping with that straight guy or whatever, and feeling sympathy about your stuff with Austin. It really made me confused, and I don’t know what to think.

To which I replied:

I think i left you one message and called you once and you didn’t answer. Either way, that’s all behind me now, so I’m not really concerned about it.

I’ve found myself jealous since you’ve been back, you were here what a week before you found a boyfriend? And here I’ve been working my ass off to try and find one and nothing works.

Where to go from here, I’m not sure. I’d like to be friends again, I really miss hanging out with you, but I don’t want to cause problems with your life at Chapman any more then I have in the past.

And then last night I get a myspace message from Steve:

I know we haven’t met. I’m Steve, I was with Andrew. I know your probably throwing me a big “f-you” right now. But, I would actually like to talk with you. Nothing serious or vindictive or with malicious motives. I just want to talk. This sounds ridiculous, I know. But if you would like to talk, I’d be more than willing. And please, don’t let Andrew get word of this message, be it directly or in blog form. He and I are done, but I would prefer that he not know about this anyways. If you disregard this message, I completely understand.

So then now I feel bad because I don’t want to cause any more problems with Andrew’s life. I was finially moving on from not being his friend any more, etc. I’m glad that Andrew e-mailed me, perhaps this will be a start of our friendship again. But I’m sad that things ended between he and Steve, mostly because I don’t want to be the cause of it.

Jon e-mailed me as well and said that he wants to hang out on Thursday so that’s exciting!

It rained all night last night and it was so pretty and relaxing. I so didn’t want to get out of bed this morning. I just wanted to lay there and listen to it rain. Sadly it’s stopped now. 🙁