I love Adam.

[LFO, “Your Heart Is Safe With Me”]

I know you know that love
can make you cry and break your heart
And you’ve been there before, you’ve been there before
And so you’re so afraid to let somebody in
Baby, won’t you try again, try again

Cause you’re heart is safe with me
I’ll never hurt you
I’ll be there through everything
I won’t make you cry
I know this world is cold
But in my arms you’ll see
That you’re heart is safe with me
That you’re heart is safe with me
Safe with me

What can I do for you to understand
you’re in good hands
I’ll never do you wrong, never do you wrong
What can I say to make your doubts to disappear
I won’t let no tears get near
No baby, I’ll be here

I will be there for you
be anything you need
Love can last forever
I’ll show you how it feels
I’ll keep my heart beside you
So your heart will see
That youre safe with me

Planning for the future (New Years)

la la la. On Saturday I asked my mom if the family would mind dispersing from the house for New Years. She said they’d consider it. I told them to go out and party for the night, get a hotel room. Have fun. She said she’d think about it. I hope they do. We’re having a party at my house weather they leave or not. It’ll be fun. We’ll watch movies and such. We’ll have a DVD player, and surround sound. Food, I like food. It’ll be good, good times. People can spend the night if they want, we have a big matress thing, couch is comfy too. And someone can sleep in my room, if anyone wants too. The guest room’s already been claimed, hehe. 😉 I’m going to try and get ahold of David too, see if he wants to come up for the weekend. It’d be good for him. Get him out of his house, and also it’d be cool for him to meet the rest of the group. Good times it’ll be. la la la E-mail/call/comment with Ideas and such.

I had a fucking wierd dream last night. I mean really fucking wierd. It involved alot of fucking too. hehe. I was working for camp again. But this time I was in scoutcraft lodge, it’s where alot of the older scouts get put up. Well, there were lots of hot guys in there this year, including like Lenz, and Shoemaker and a bunch of others. Well in the dream, it was our break time, right after lunch. And I was going back to sleep some. Well I walk in there, and there’s all the guys in there (like 20) all nude, and well having lots of inter-personal time. Yeah, it was good. lol. I liked that dream. (I’m amazed I remember it too).

But yeah this morning was really wierd. I remember having lots of dreams, but that’s the only one I can remember, and then I woke up about 3 and couldn’t get back to sleep. I just laid there, thinking about things, mostly Adam, but other things as well.

la la la. Go read boy-ashamed.

Final week of classes

[Duncan Sheik, “Alibi”‘]

Well, it’s the final week of classes. Angel returns this Friday, and well finals are next week. I went to English this morning and talked to the teacher about the final some. The max number of pages you can have is 8. So far I have 6, and I still have alot to write about. So I’m going to have to cut alot out, alot of stuff that I really don’t want to cut out, but she’s a bitch. Oh well. Went to Soc, Vero said she wasn’t coming, so yeah. It was boring there. Good news in that class though is there’s no class on Friday, so yeah. I have English (at 9 am) and then Math (at 2 pm). I’m thinking I might skip Math cause so far his reveiw hasn’t helped me any. I can just spend the time reveiwing on my own. We’ll see what the weekend brings.

My room mates a fucking dumb ass. I got up this morning, he was still in bed. I went to class, then another class, then I ate lunch and I came back, he was still in bed. The phone rang about one. It was for him. He took it, got out of bed. Sat down and started playing his stupid fucking video game. I left for class, he was still playing his game, in his boxers and a t-shirt. I came back from class, and he’s still there. Grr. I hate him.

That’s all for today. I still have to write alot on my paper, but I think I’m going to wait tell Wed to finish that. I have to study accounting now.

Whew. What a weekend.

Alrighty. I’m back. It was really hard to leave tonight. I’ll get to that later. But first….

Saturday morning I went shopping with my mom. I got my mom and my dad a DVD player, and I bought my brother a calander, and I got Adam something that I hope he’ll really like. It should be cool. I know he’s really into it, so he should like it. But yeah. Shopping with my mom just really annoys me. I won’t go into details, but we spent an hour and a half at Fraklin Covey in MHM. Now if you’ve ever been there, you know how small the store is, and well if you don’t know what it is, they sell datebooks to big rich business people. It’s the most boring store in the world. The only thing that kept me entertained was the hot guys walking by and the Palm Pilots. They were fun. And also, I have determinded that my mother should be given a Geo Metor, and she should not be allowed to drive a big fucking ass Truck thing. Yep.

We were supposed to be done shopping by 12, but of course we weren’t we didn’t get back tell like 2ish. So I went quickly over to Adam’s house, we went shopping too. I like shopping with him, we at least like looking at the same things. It was good times. Then that night we went to the Crystal Ball at AHS. That was sooooooooooooooo much fun, omg. Good fucking times. I was hit on my str8 girls, who were then very embarrased once they got pulled away and were told that I was in fact gay. And there were just so many cute guys there. But it was good fucking times. To much to really get into here. After that Adam and I went to my house and went hot tubing, the stars were so pretty, it was just amazing. After that we went into my house, and just sat there looking at the christmas tree talking about random things. It was good. I wished he could have stayed the night though, that would have been cool.

Then this morning I went over to his house, we went out. Did stuff, then we decided to highlight my hair. So we went to Wal-Mart and found some stuff, but the stuff I wanted to use didn’t have the cap. So I called Adam’s mom, she was at Wal-Mart too. We talked to her and got her opinion on things. I was going to highlight my hair blonde, then pull the cap off and then highlight it again with either red or blue, I think I might do that next weekend. I think it would look really cool. We’ll see. But yeah, we just highlighted my hair, and then Adam was like. “I want to dye my hair blonde.” So he did. It turned out really orange. But I think it looks good. It’s a nice change. He’s cute with it like that. We went and saw Tara and Jessica both of thier mouths dropped to the ground when they saw him. It was soo funny. His mom and Rob both freaked out. But good times. After we were done with that, we just hung out in his room and talked about more random things. We talked about moving to AZ, and our plans. We’ve now pushed the moving back to 2007. But things should still all work out right. I mean, it’ll be good. I can’t wait tell then.

Adam’s mom asked me to stay for supper, that was really nice of her, and it meant so much to me. I really like her dishes too. lol. She said we could have them when she gets new ones. lol. They’re so great. I love Adam’s family. After supper we went back into Adam’s room and talked some more, really good times there. I mean, we just laid there and talked, but that’s what I love doing so much with him, just laying there, looking into his eyes, talking about random things.

We got onto the topic of where would we be if we hadn’t met up. Where would we be right now. Well, I was going to go to PA to work this past summer, which means I never would have met Adam, and right now, I would have been in PA, going to school in Media, and I’d probably be sitting in my Apartment being all depressed or something. But also, if I hadn’t quite my job at camp then, where would I have been? Well. I’d probably either still be going to school in PA, or I would be here, in my dorm just sitting on my ass all weekend, every weekend. I never would have become so close to Adam if I hadn’t quit my job because of him. He’s the one that inspired me ot quit my job. I’m so glad that I met him, and that our lives have turned out the way that they have.

I love you Adam. I’ll never let you go. You’ll always be on my mind. You’ll always be missed, every second we’re apart, your smile, your voice, you. You will always be with me, every where I go. I love you Adam.

Weekend Dancy fun.

[ABBA, “Dancing Queen”]

I have to hear some dance music since they wouldn’t play any last night at the actual dance. Bastards….

Quick recap of the weekend so far.

Friday night Adam ended up being able to go out. So we went out. I was in a really good mood. I’d had two frozen Cappacino’s (Sp). It was good times. On the way downtown Adam asked me what I wanted to talk about. I wasn’t in the mood to talk about it, I was in too good of a mood. But he persisted, we talked. It was good. Things are good. You know, it seems that I say that every weekend. But to tell you the truth, things really are good. Sometimes we just have a few small things that we need to talk about. Thing are good. So we went downtown, hung out. Met up with everyone. Adam got this smelly stuff. It smells good. We left about 11, went back to his flat. Hung out and talked tell 2. It was good. The moon Friday night was fucking cool. It had a purple tint to it. So cool.

Last night, omg, last night was so cool. To much to talk about here, cause I hate this computer’s keyboard and people keep bothering me. So I’ll talk about it tonight when I get home.

I’m off to see Mandy now, and hopefully Adam will call soon, so I can go see him. Laters all