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As We Say Goodbye

Wow, All I’ve got so far is the title, and I’m already starting to cry. I have a feeling this isn’t going to be a happy entry.

Lets start off with the rest of Monday night. We got to the Airport and I waited around for them to get there. Finally they showed up, but then it took forever to get the luggage.

Got to the hotel and dropped off our stuff and then headed out to Target to get stuff fro Andrew’s Dorm room. We found it and then decided to eat, so we stopped at a Subway and got some food. Good times, after that we walked over to Target and got stuff.

Andrew seemed to be getting very annoyed with his mother there. I tried to comfort him some, but I don’t really think it helped much. We got a bunch of stuff and then headed back to the hotel.

Sue’s a very scary driver. Especially when she’s on her cell phone and trying to drive at the same time. I’m surprised she hasn’t killed someone yet!

Back at the hotel, Sue went to bed and Andrew and I went to the hot tub. Sat in there and talked untell some straight boys notice there was a gay couple in there and stated sitting on their balcony and yelling funny things.

Went back to the room after that and sat and talked, we didn’t really talk about much and now I’m really regretting that. There’s so much that I wanted to talk about now, so much that I wanted to say to him to tell him how much he means to me, and how much I’m going to miss him. Anyways, All the gushing is for a private entry, I’ll spare all you that.

About 11 or so we went to bed, though that was really about 2AM New Jersey time, so we were really tired.

Didn’t sleep well at all that night, probably because of my nerves, we both were awake again by 5:30. Again, I would also have to say that has to do with our biological clocks, it would have been 8:30 in New Jersey.

We laid in bed tell 7:30 when Sue called us to see if we wanted to go to breakfast, so we did. Ate and then went back to the room to get ready to go. There was an accident on one of the roads that we needed to take, so Sue insisted on leaving UBER early, we left the hotel about 9:30, even though Andrew didn’t check in tell Noon.

Got there about 10:30, after stopping at a drugstore to get a few things we forgot, and driving around the area. The accident wasn’t.

Once we got there we walked around campus some. It was so pretty there and it makes me REALLY mad that I didn’t get into SDSU, and didn’t apply anywhere else. I really liked it there even though it was a pretty small campus. It was nice and comfy and Andrew should get along great there! All the people were so friendly.

About 11:30 or so we headed over to his dorm and got checked in.

One of his other roommates showed up shortly after we got there and they talked. Both of his roommates seem very nice, though one of them is a Basketball player and the other is a football player. That’ll be semi-nice for Andrew because that will mean they will be gone a lot, for practices and away games, etc. Also they both live fairly close, so I would guess they would go home on some weekends.

The whole move in thing was a mess and I just stayed back out of the way. The parents were all fighting over how the room should be set up and the Kids didn’t care, all very funny. Plus the other two roomies both brought like their WHOLE family with them, there were so many people in the room it was hard to get around.

We broke for lunch about 1ish and it was really good. After that went back to his room and hung out some.

His mom called and got an earlier flight, so she left about 3ish. I tried giving her some money for everything that she’s done for me, but she wouldn’t take it. I eventually got her to, after throwing it at her and then quickly jumping back in the room and locking the door.

After that it was just me and Andrew for a little bit and he set up a lot of his room, he really does well with that, and it was starting to look like someone lived there by the time that I left. Very cute area. I have pictures of it all and I’ll have to post them when I get time. Actually I have close to 150 picutres of the trip. Everyone of them is cute and has a wonderfully story behind it.

We sat around his room forever, him talking to his roommate and setting up.

About 6:30 we went over to the Luau (Spelling??). That was tons of fun, though the food sucked. So we hung out there for about an hour and then went over to a c-store and got some ice cream with his roomie.

After that it was back to the dorm, I sat around while he and everyone else was in meetings. That was alright, I put the pictures that I had on his computer and watched a slide show of them all, set to the music of the CD that I had made him. I cried a lot while he was gone, mostly because I wanted to get it all out before we had to say our final goodbyes that night.

After he got back we headed right out to say our goodbyes. I got a bit annoyed because as we were walking across campus I wanted to hold his hand, it would be the LAST time that I got to walk around with him, and hold his hand, but he didn’t want too. He was too afraid. But I was annoyed because there was NO ONE around to be afraid of, it was just us. Whatever though. I got over it. I didn’t want to ruin our last time together.

I called a taxi at 10, and asked for it to be at the corner of Orange and Palm at 10:30. We had 30 minutes to say goodbye.

Well 10:30 rolled around and we had got most of the crying out of the way and were just waiting around for the taxi to get there,. 10:40, I called the company to find out where the hell my cab was. They said that it had already picked someone up,.

I was SO pissed off, I mean how the hell could it have picked up the wrong person. WE were the ONLY people standing at the corner of Orange and Palm. How in the WORLD could it have picked up the wrong people, so I stated bitching at the guy, mostly because I was very emotional and very stressed out. And the fucker HUNG up on me!

So I called back and just calmly asked for another cab. By that time it was 10:52 or so. The cab finally got there at 11:10 and I got home at 11:30.

I’m very glad that I had a good cab driver though, he talked to me the whole way home, so I didn’t have any time to just sit there and stew about Andrew being gone, about how I had to leave him in this place where he’s all alone. But I’m sure that by that time today, he’ll have made friends.

The ride was $31 dollars though, I couldn’t believe how expensive it was.

Saying goodbye wasn’t has hard as I thought it would be, Don’t get me wrong it was so hard for me to get in that taxi and leave him standing there on the corner by himself. I couldn’t hardly stand it.

And I was very annoyed with myself because while I was waiting for him to get out of his meeting, I though of so much that I wanted to say to him before we left each other, but then as we were standing there saying goodbye, I couldn’t think of any of it. And there still is so much that I want to say to him,.

I still can’t believe though that last night was the last time I’m going to get to see him tell Christmas. The last time, All I have now are the pictures and I just don’t know if I can handle that. I didn’t want him to go. I want him to come back to Iowa.

I can’t believe that when I get back to Iowa, I won’t have him to call up on the weekends and say, Hey want to go out.

I can’t believe that I no longer have such a wonderfull boyfriend. I’ve lost him. And I can only hope that some day our paths will cross again.

This flight home is going to be a long one, and so is theride home for the airport. I don’t know if I can handle that or not. I just want the next 4 months to be over, I want it to be Christmas so that we can see each other again. I want it to be next summer so that we can be together again.

I really really hope that plans work out so that he can be in Ames next summer. And I hope even more that he can get into SDSU. Because now being back in Cali for even these three days I’ve fallen back in love with it.

I remember when I loved it there so much the first time, and now I want to go back and make that my home.

Anyhow, once I got back, was very hard though, staying in the hotel room where just the night before we had been together, and slept in the same bed together. Seeing that he had forgotten his flight stubs, and there was a pair of his underwear in the bathroom. These little reminders of him, made me so sad. I just laid in bed for a while crying.

This morning I got up and checked out. I got a nice driver again for the ride to the airport and I was the only one in the shuttle, so we talked a bit. He was deffinitaly gay and we talked about the area and how great it is to live there.

Got to the airport and the lines were all uber long, though I got through in plenty of time. I only had to wait about a 20 minutes before they stated boarding the plane.

And now here I am, we’ve been in the jet about an hour now, and it’s a 4 hour flight, I’ll be into Detroit about 4:00 Eastern time. I don’t want to be there.

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