Chris' Site

Last night I was laying in bed, just thinking about things, and I came up with like 3 really good poems. Of course, now I can’t remember them. I should get a laptop, so I can just sit in bed and write them down. Oh well. Maybe I’ll remember them laters.

Not much is really going on here. I’m at work, installing Redhat 7.2 and looking into RAID’s. I dunno if we should go with a Software RAID or a hardware RAID. Vermont crashed over the weekend and now Nazanin is finally taking backup’s seriously. We had EDNT and LINUX backing up Vermont, so we were dafe, but now Mike came in Monday and fucked up EDNT cause he’s a twat and now it’s not backing up at all. The Ass. He shouldn’t be allowed to touch my computers ever again.

Ok, well I’m off to do some more work, laters.

So this morning I woke up in a really good mood cause I watched QaF last night, and got a good nights sleep. I headed off to class, got all the freaking way over to Food Sciences, and found out that class was cancelled. Well I was to lazy to walk back to my dorm room, so I sat in Curitss and read the news paper and wrote the intro to my paper. I thought it was pretty good. After that I slept for about an hour or so. It was good times.

After I spet for a while, I went to class. Soc was damn boring this morning. I don’t even remember what all we talked about. So yeah. I have to start studying shit here soon. Like mad studying. But whatever.

Adam’s feeling better now, which is a really good thing. He said he’s going to try and go to school tomorrow. I just hope that I don’t come down with what he has, I can’t afford to miss any work or school. So yeah. If I get sick, he’s in trouble. lol.

Ok, not much really going on. Vero gave me Civ III and I’m burning it right now. I’ve heard it’s a really fun game and every since Civ II I’ve wanted to buy it. But I’ve just never cared enough to spend the money. I’m out now to fix the firewall on Linux. Laters all.

[Lion King, “Can You Feel The Love Tonight”]

Well, I just got back to the dorm from Adam’s house. He’s still dead sick today. It makes me sad to see him like this. I just hope that he gets better soon. I hated leaving him like that too. I mean I’ve spent so much time at thier house this weekend. So much time just laying there with him. Hoping that my being there would help him get better. I know it won’t, but I just like being there for him. I like to just lay there with him, watch him sleep, listen to him breathing, taking care of him. Just talking to him. Thier house feels more like home to me then my own house does. When I’m there I have this urge to help Melinda out, to pick things up for her. It’s just that being there makes me so happy, a happyness that isn’t in my house, they feel like a family to me. I wish my family would feel like family, but they don’t. There’s just so much built up hatred and anger there. I can’t get along with them, I never will be able to get along with them again. It’s just not possible.

I’m probably going to be sick this next week now and I’ll regret being over there when he was so sick. But I loved the time that I was there with him. I really did. I love you, Adam.

So, Chris… What’d you do today? Umm, well I went over to Adam’s and layed on his couch all day. Yep, that’s what I did all day long. But ya know what. It was the best day in the world. Not for Adam, unfortunetly, but for me I had a great time. Just laying there with talking to, caring for the person that I love, who’s sick. We just talked all day, watched TV. Did nothing. It was so great. I mean, it’s little things like this that I like, little things like that this that makes me want to be his boyfriend more then just his friend. But it was still a great time. I just hope that he gets better soon. I hate seeing him sick.

Well, since that’s all I did, that’s all I’m going to update about. Laters all.

[Back Street Boys, “I Want You Back”]

Ok, so tonight I went out with Julian, Dean, Mandy and Adam. It was good times to see everyone again. I haven’t seen Dean in like forever. So it was cool to get to hang out with him again. We went rollerskating the first part of the night, that was amusing. It was like teen night or something so there were a bunch of like 12 year olds there. But the Dj was pretty hot, so that was good. After that we went to Villiage Inn and ate supper, then we went downtown. It was a good night.

I’m still having a bit of a problem with somethings though. I feel as though when ever we go out with a large group, Adam tends to distance himself from me. I don’t really know how to explain it. Maybe I’m just being nittpicky (spelling) because of our commitmentless relationship status. I mean, the thought of him going out with someone else scares me to death. I would be so upset if that were to happen, but yet he doesn’t want a relationship with me. It’s all confusing. We talked about all this the other night which helped some, but still. I don’t think this problems going to go away until there is commitment, but I don’t want to push it. When and or if he’s ready, that’s when it will happen. I’ve given him my thoughts on the subject. He knows that I want a relationship again. So the balls in his court as to weather or not we start one again.

On a bit of a happier note; You have just read the first real entry created by Greymatter. YAY!