I feel homeless

This month sucks…

So not only the roommate/trip drama, taxes being due (and having to pay $102,000 to the GOV!), and now my fucking BIKE has been stolen. So I’m going to have to go buy a new one now. I’m totally broke AF.

I feel completely homeless right now. I’m basically living at Charle’s house and his brothers are clearly not happy that I am here all the time. I can’t go back to my own apartment cause it’s AWK AF and I don’t even feel comfortable living there any more.

When we got home, I emailed the PM and asked what our options were to move out. The PM replied that the lease break fee is $17,000!!! He offered a few other options. 1) Derik moving out and I would have to to re-qualify for the apartment, not a problem but I feel like Derik should still owe something. 2) Rent Responsible – Which means that we would have to pay rent (and not live there) until they find a new person. This is pretty risky, but I guess a pretty good option.

I emailed Derik the options. 1) We break the lease and because he wants to break it, he should pay the majority of the Lease break fee (75%) or 2) He moves out and I keep the apartment but he pays for 50% of the remaining months rent ($8k).

He replied and just said “neither of these options work for me”. I replied with “ok, you’re the one who wants to move out, what options do you suggest” and he replied “none of these work for me”. WTF. Ok how about you fucking SUGGEST an option that DOES work for you. It’s a fucking negotiation here. You tell me what you want, I told you what I wanted.

Like at this point. I just really want him out. I want to be able to go to my own house and not feel uncomfortable that he’s going to randomly show up. I was at the apartment on saturday afternoon to do laundry and honestly, I couldn’t get out of there fast enough.

I think there’s some other options that we can do but honestly I don’t really want to fucking suggest them to him. I’m also not sure where the fuck I am going after this. If we move forward with just moving out what do I do next? Do I just go ahead and get an apartment by myself, do I jump and get a place with Charlie? I feel it’s way too early to get a our own place but at the same time. We practically live together since January anyway. Do I move away from the bay, leaving behind Charlie and just doing my own fucking thing.

The other options are
1) We do the rent responsible thing – This could cost us each $1,800 or it could end up costing us $16,000 each. Just depending on how long it takes them to fill the apartment. One month or the remaining lease months? Will they actually put effort into filling an empty apartment that’s already being paid for?
2) He just move out and I don’t charge him anything. This would be a horrible financial option for me, but I can afford it. That just means that I would be spending nearly $4k/month on rent for an apartment. Charlie would basically move in with me there (free-ish)
3) Find a new roommate to replace one of the two of us. This could be an option but a little difficult to find someone who’s willing to pay $1800/month for one bedroom with some random person they don’t already know. If we could find a traveling nurse that would be perfect.
4) I dunno. Is there any other option? Or are we just stuck together for 8 more months.

This whole situation just really sucks. Since I was 18 years old, I’ve had MY OWN PLACE (except for one short stint in a shared rental in OC). I’ve always been the one in control, the one who makes the decisions about what happens. Now here I am fucking 40 years old and stuck, practically homeless with no where that I feel comfortable being.

I wish I could go back 8 months, not sell the Vallejo house and just still be there. Had I known things were going to go the way they were with Charlie, I would have stayed there.

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