Ugh.. I dunno what’s going on anymore.
While Austin’s mom was here, he was all.. “I miss hanging out with you”…. “I miss you”…”Hey hun”.. Etc. Which would indicate to me that he “misses hanging out with me”, no?
Well yesterday we made plans.. I’d go over to his house, we’d hang out there, cook supper, I’d spend the night and then we’d go out to go camping early in the morning and spend Saturday and Sunday morning camping.
So I get home from work, pack all my shit into my car, and then he’s all like. “Well, no hurry to come over”. So I sit around playing video games and then finially he calls me and I head over there… get there and go hang out in his room. And he makes a comment as if I was never invited to stay the night. So I just take that if he doesn’t want me to stay.
And it just fucking went down hill from there. Don’t get me wrong, I enjoyed spending the time with him again. But I just kept getting more and more pissed with him. Sudenly it was too cold to go camping so we were going to go at noon and spend the night. Then I was going to go and he was just going to meet me and if he got bored he would leave. Then the grilling that night got cancelled and I practicallyhad to drag him down to get food cause I was starving.
So we watched this movie and it got over at 11pm. And I just was so annoyed that I was just like.. “Well I’m going home” So I left, and Iw as really sad, because I had realy been looking forward to spending the night with him again. So I drove down to the place where we were going to go camping and sat on the beach for alittle bit and just cried cause I’m so confused.
All I really want out of him is a friend, but I can’t deal with this being jerked around constantly on plans.
Then today I just kept hoping all day that he would say, “Ok, lets do something” but every time I talked to him he just took forever to repsond and would disappear without saying bye or anything. And It’s just relaly pissed me off all day.
It’s ok that he’s in a bad mood, but there’s no reason to be like this to me. I would be perfectly happy just hanging out with him at his house if he’s too lazy. Just fucking tell me. Don’t make plans and then jerk around withme.
It’s also starting to really annoy me about Blake. Ever since Austin came around he’s been pretty much ignoring me. It just makes me sad because I’ve been there so much for him over the last 6 months and it just seems like he just dropped me like that.
Ugh, why are boys so confusing!
Here I thought I had finially met someone who would be a great friend and it feels like things are just going to shits.