My Life

I Feel So Stupid

I feel so stupid right now.

I always feel so left out of the loop when my feelings are involved.

Sometimes, I just want to kill myself because I feel that I can never live up to what I want.

6 replies on “I Feel So Stupid”

I am serious.. I get so frustrated with not being able to live up to my own ideals, what I want for my own life, that it just seems easier to give up and die. To no longer be burdened day and night with feeling that I’m such a loser.

However, the means to do it, is not there.

Then maybe you need to lower your ideals or make them longer term goals?

And you are not a loser. I could tell you about myself but I will not bore you. You went to college, got a job in another state how far away from Iowa? You have made friends since being there.

So Chris you are not a loser!!!!

But I can’t lower my ideals, I want the best for me and for the people that I love. As for long term goals, those are the ones that bug me the most. Goals that are 50 or so years away, I feel like I’ll never reach them.

Plus the goals that have long been set and missed. Those annoy me as well.

And sure, I went to college, I moved, to a place that I’m not happy for the wrong reason and I’ve only made one friend, who lives 3 hours away and I get to see MAYBE once a month, and to top it all off is dying.

No dying for you-it isn’t allowed. Without you the balance in the family tips in favor of the freaks and we can’t have that.

Besides-I’m counting on you to teach Keira how to be a frugal miser. God knows she won’t learn it from me.

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