You know, right now I don’t know who to be more annoyed at. Courtney or Andrew.
Today’s the second time in a week that she’s tried to take away from the time that Andrew and I ALWAYS spend together. It’s getting pretty annoying.
At first the plans were for him to go over to Courtney’s house, and have lunch there. I really wasn’t that upset about it though because it was her mom that was wanting to cook him a dinner. I can understand why I wouldn’t be invited to that. It was her families food, etc.
Well now the plan is that him, Courtney and Jean from work are going to go out to a resturant for lunch. This fairly annoys me more. I don’t see why I couldn’t have been invited to go out to the resturant as well. I mean, it’s not like I’d be a HUGE inconvience, or ruin their together time.
You know, back a couple weeks ago, something happened where someone wanted him to do something on a weekend, and only him. But he told them no because it was our time together. But now he’s just making plans without me.
Though, I know, or at least am pretty sure, he’s not doing it on purpose. Last night he read my private entry from the other day. And just broke down crying.
I couldn’t tell though what kind of crying it was, and he wouldn’t talk to me about it. So I had no idea if he was crying because he was upset that I felt that way, or if he was upset because it was true, or what.
I just really feel like shit lately. I feel like I’m putting way to much pressure on him, and taking away to much of his time from other people. Though I think that I’m justified in asking for the time together.
I really want our last few days together here in Iowa to be great. I’ve had so much planned, but I have a feeling that some of those things will get ruined because I’m a bit upset about the way that I’m acting.
Also another thing about the way that he’s acting. The other day when we were in the mall I went to hold his hand, and he pulled away from me. Then I tried kissing him on the check and pulled away again. I asked him what the problem was and he said that he felt uncomfortable doing that in public. But the thing is that we’ve held hands/kissed in that mall tons of times before. I just don’t see what the difference was that day. I was just a bit saddened by that.