Oct 3, [Sophie B. Hawkins, "Right Beside You"]
Three months ago today I was sitting in a tree along the Des Moines river
with someone that I had the biggest crush on. There in that tree, on that
night. We made the commitment to be Boy Friends. I was so excited that night.
Little did I know that that person would change my life so drastically,
change my life for the better, and take me through what I’ve been thought.
Little did I know that I would soon fall in love with that person. Little
did I know that our relationship together would only last a short time,
but our relationship as friends would continue to grow and that we would
become closer and closer. Little did I know. Looking back, I’m glad that
things happened the way they did. Of course, I wish I could change some
things, but we’ve had the best times of my life together, and I’m sure that
there will always be more good times to come. As I sit here looking at his
picture I think about what we’ve shared, what we’ve been though. How much
closer that all has brought us.
It takes a minute to like someone, an hour to have a crush one someone,
and a day to love someone; but it takes a life time to forget someone.
I hate being away from him. When we’re apart it feels like I’m missing
apart of who I am. I want that part back and I try everyday to live as though
that parts not missing, as though he’s never been in my life cause it hurts
so much to live with out him close by. It hurts because he is such a great
friend, because I love him, becuase I know that I can’t have him. It hurts
because when I go to bed because he is on my mind, when I space out in class
it’s him that’s in my day dreams, when I’m sitting at lunch, I wish he would
walk though those doors so I can talk to him, when I’m walking to class,
it’s him I wish were there talking to me. He’s everywhere I go, but he’s
no where that I go.
I want the weekends to be here. I want the weeks to be over, I want AZ
to be now, I want our future to be happy, I don’t want to loose him ever
as a freind. I don’t want to have to leave him again, I don’t want to have
to say goodbye. I don’t want to have to see him go, I don’t want to have
to be the one to go.