My Life

Posted By Alton

This was posted by Alton Brown, who has a wonderful TV show on food network…
I thought this was VERY amusing!

Okay, calm down folks. I’m not saying that HFCS or partially hydrogenated vegetable oil are evil in and of themselves. But I do think that there are lots (and I do mean lots) of hidden calories in foods that look relatively innocent,on the surface at least. By ruling these foods out (which is tough because they’re in just about everything) I’m forcing myself away from heavily processed foods which will help me control my intake and think seriously about every food that goes in my mouth.

If I’ve said it once I’ve said it 97 times: there are no bad foods, just bad food habits. If I’m fat (and I’m not saying that I am) it’s not Ronald McDonald’s fault, or ConAgra’s fault or Ben & Jerry’s fault, or my mom’s fault or anyone’s fault but my own. I don’t support lawsuits against fast food any more than I support lawsuits against cigarette companies. Anyone who doesn’t know cigarettes are bad for you is an idiot. Anyone who doesn’t know that eating too much fast food will make you fat,ditto. In fact I think I may organize a class action lawsuit against people who stage lawsuits against corporations who they think should take responsibility for them. Criminy! Most corporations can barely take responsibility for themselves much less others.

If I’m fat it’s because I’ve shoved to many calories down my pie hole. I don’t need to chat with Oprah about it and I sure don’t need to consult that loathsome profiteer Dr Phil. I just need to stop eating so much and exercise more.

Are we clear?

And no I don’t mean Krystal,that’s partly how I got into this mess to start with.

Hmmm,think instead of dessert I’ll file a lawsuite.

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