So I’m pretty proud of myself for going out this last weekend… I mean going out with someone who I’ve never met before is usually totally out of who I am. It’s really not something that I would ever do. I plus, as Andrew said last night, me hugging people who I’ve never met before is really not me. I think that I’ve come along ways over the last 8 months to a year, and I think that I have Andrew to thank for most of that. I really think that he’s helped my self-esteam quite a bit and he’s helped me to really get out there and do some crazy shit.
Well, as crazy as shit gets in my life. I’m so happy right now in life though, I’ve got a great boyfriend, who I just lived with wonderfully for a whole month. Which if you ask me is a HUGE accomplishment all in itself. I really am very happy in our relationship. Even though we are so far apart, I think that it makes me realize how wonderful he is.
Everytime he comes back, it’s like rediscovering why I love him so much, why we put up with so much over the time that we’re apart, to stay together. And not take the easy way out of… Just taking a break.
Being away from him has made me stronger and more sure of myself, it’s made me happier in our relationship and helped me to realize that I can get through some really tough things. This semester though is going to be our greatest challenge of them all so far though. With the longest stretch of being away from each other we’ve yet to have. More then 60 days. But if we can make it, I have strong hopes that that means we can make it through so much more.
I’m a little scared though as to what will happen when he goes to study abroad. I know it’s only time before that happens, and I hope that we can work things out to make the best of it.
I’m happy in my life now, and it’s getting even better gradually. My social life is expanding for the first time in years, into friends who I’ve made on my own for once, instead of just hanging out with my bf and his friends. I’ve got people that I know want to make out with me, or get with me, and I get to tease them because I’m taken. And knowing that people find me that attractive is just such a great thing for me. Now I just have to keep with my promise to myself to have visible pecs by the time I go to Mexico. 😀
I really miss my baby really badly, and I wish that he could have been here for this last weekend. He would have been so proud of me, I think. Because of the things that I went out and did. 🙂
I love you Drew Bear!! ::hugs::