Fuck Friends

Ok, so there’s a ton of stuff that I didn’t want to write about in my normal journal…

The first thing is the friends fiasco. I’ve been very annoyed with a lot of people lately. And I’ve come to the conclusion that no matter how close you think you are to your “friends”. Really all that they are is a bunch of back stabing bastards. Angel has been back in town for a while now. At least a month. She sent me a wedding invite, but I think that was just as a courtesy thing. You see, apparently it was her birthday on Monday, and she had a get together of all our “friends”. Now, I’ll give you the fact that I’m not the closest of any of them. But I think of all of them, I was closest to Angel.

Well the story goes, she made the plans, she invited people. But she NEVER called me. She called Vero and Julian for sure that I know of, and I assume that there were many more people based on the way that Vero talked. It just really pisses me off that these people that I considered to be some of my good “friends” can just blow me off like that. And based on the way that Vero talks in her journal, no one even thought of me, “yeah, yeah. she asked about you when you came up in conversation, if that makes you feel any better. (hehe.)” What the fuck!

I’m just so annoyed with these people. And then the way everyone else has been treating me lately. (And by everyone else I mean, Vero, Julian and the whole Adam situation). The fucker is just stealing my “friends”. I shouldn’t have been such a nice person when I broke up with him. I should have stated right away why I was breaking up with him, and how I felt that the relationship should have ended far earlier. And how I had no immediate plans to get with anyone else. It just really pisses me off and all I could think about last night was two things, Andrew… And how much I wanted to go fucking punch all of these so called “friends”.

I’m going to call the woman here sometime. I just have to get up the nerve to do so.

Alright, on to other things, now that I’ve got that annoyance out.

The last week has been wonderfull with Andrew. Spending so much time with him. I just wish that this routine could continue through the rest of the summer. But I know that’s not going to happen.

Wed night was a very sad night. We were standing upstairs, and I don’t remember what happened, but we were hugging and something set me off and I started crying, and he was crying. Then we went down to his room and pretty much just cried the rest of the night. We held each other, and cried, we kissed. It was so sad.

At one time, he asked me. “What’s going to happen to us.” I’ve been wondering the same thing, and all I could think of, was “I don’t know.” Because I don’t. I’d like to think that a long distance relationship would work, but they never seem to actually work. Maybe one of only 9 months would. But you never know. It’s so sad. I guess this is something that we’re going to have to talk about sooner or later. I’d rather later then sooner though.

I’d hate to see us at the airport. Someone’s going to have to carry me off to my flight.

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