An Update??

Well, I really want to update about A LOT of stuff, so if this starts and then doesn’t get finished, I’ll do that tomorrow. It’s really late as it is and my back is hurting and I’m sick.

So the last couple days I’ve been feeling really nastalgic (sp?, use?). Anyways, with Andrew’s graduation coming up, and the summer, I’ve been thinking about alot. The biggest thing on my mind is scouting, and how much I would LOVE to go and work at camp this summer, or to even spend a week camping somewhere with a troop. I just REALLY want to be able to be back into the scouts. So sad really. I miss that time so much, it’s one of the few things that’ll bring me to tears just thinking about all the great times that I’ve spent camping at Mitigwa, Jester, Ledges, The Canyon, Philmont, Pine Ridge, and everyone else that I’ve been to. It makes me sad to not hear those songs all summer long, even though I usually complained about having to sing them, I still really enjoyed them. The Mitigwa Hymn, Fight song, Philmont Hymn, On My Honor, and the hundreds more that were sung each summer. I miss the Sun/Wed/Fri night skits and the ceremonies. I miss Smokies inspiring words at the end of every Friday night, even though they were the same ones every Friday, I still miss them. He delivered them with such emotion. I being on staff and staying there on the stage, singing songs and having a great time until all the scouts were out of the ampitheather. I miss the late nights and the scout parties. The ambushing of the Extreme Team, the water fights between Family Circle and Tent City. I miss all that time spent in ScoutCraft teaching all those young faces that look up to you, and hang on every word you say. I wish that I could go back, but I can’t.

Anyways, also I’ve been thinkinga a lot about my graduation, and I’m just going to try and be there for Andrew, because I know it’s an emotional time.

Today has been really good though even though I have been sick. I met up with Andrew about 10:45ish and we hung around his house for a while. We went through a bunch of his photos for a b-day present for Dustin, he’s got so many of them, and his life is so well documented, it makes me want to take more photos. But at the same time, I don’t want to. Anyways, at some point I want to go through a bunch of his photos from like the last year or so and get copies of alot of the ones with my “friends” in them.

After that we went to Hy-Vee to get copies made and the woman was a total bitch. From there off to Cheddars to meet up with a ton of people from Andrew’s HS. I’m sure I wasn’t much fun there, but I was sick, and when I’m sick I A) Get airheaded, B) Don’t like to be out, and C) Don’t talk much when I am out. But it was amusing non-the-less we had yet another HORRIBLE waitress. Although she did bring me a pitcher of Ice Tea, it didn’t taste very good though, so I didn’t drink as much as normal. Food was good, and we each paid for our own, although I meant to pay for Andrew’s. Oh well I guess it’s alright for us to each pay sometimes.

After food we went to the Mall and did the normal mall thing. It’s getting very boring there, I can’t wait tell the new mall. Even though I’ll probably be gone by the time it’s finished. And also once Andrew leaves I’ll probably not venture to the mall unless I need something for myself, cause we all know that I won’t have anyone to hang out with then.

Mall back to his house. We laid in his bed talking, and making out. Then all of a sudden, he whipped his dick out and jacked it right there! I was like, OMG, I can’t beleive you are doing this. You’re mother is upstairs and the door is OPEN! Crazy. He eventually came, and it was funny because his mom yelled at him just after he was done. So very weird. I swear that woman has eyes all over that house. Anyways, he got a letter from the magistrate, all he would tell me is something about a court date and perhaps loosing his license again. I held him, about all I could really do. Hopefully it made him feel better. He eventually found out that it was just about the last court date and them claiming they never got the checks. Fucking Government for you!

After that was over we were just laying on his bed when his mom came down and talked to him about something, so we went upstairs and she complained at him. Something about he’s not supposed to have boys alone in his room. Even though the door was OPEN! Fucking crazy Sue. I don’t think she understands that once a person turns 18, you’re supposed to give them more leaway, not less. Perhaps she’s having withdrawl or something. Who knows.

So after that shit went down and since we weren’t allowed into his room we watched the simpsons and then king of the hill. Funny shit there, and we made out on the couch upstairs, instead of in his bed room! lol. About 6ish he went and changed and then we were upstairs talking. I asked him if he wanted me to go to his baccalaureate, and he said that I only had to go if I wanted too. Well I did want to go, but I didn’t want to feel out of place, and I only wanted to go if he wanted me to go. You know one of those situations. Well somewhere in there he got emotional and started crying, and I asked him what was wrong. He wouldn’t say, so again I just held him. I still have no idea this time why he was crying. But like I said, if I ask, and they don’t want to tell, I don’t pester about that type of thing, it’s up to them if they want to tell why they were crying or not. Anyways, we were leaving to go, and in the car he said that he felt like he had guilted me into going and I told him that he hadn’t and that I wanted to go. I wanted to be there for him, in some way try and hopefully be there to show my support. I dunno.

Anyways we went and it was good. I really hated the speaker, god god god. That’s all he said, and the movie was in spanish. But the song they played made me cry, like not just a few tears but really cry. It was so sad. And then the sax player made me really want to dig out my sax and play again. We all know that won’t happen. Perhaps I’ll just dig out Kenny and listen to him some. The awards part was good, and it was really amusing to hear the reactions from everyone when they announced Andrew’s $60,000 scholarship. I think it’d be really funny if HS students got the kind of awards that Krell gives out, they’d be announcing $400,000-500,000 scholarships. lol.

After that we went back to his house and layed on his bed… Amazing that Sue let us back into his room. I left there about 9:30, well tried to leave, it’s always so hard to actually LEAVE! I dunno what we’re going to do this summer when it’s not too cold to stand there and kiss all night long! And the moon was so pretty too! Too bad it’s not tonight though, there’s going to be a full eclispe of the moon. Starting about 9 and going tell midnight. Anyhow I finally left…

I was driving along and checking to see if I had any messages. Well I did and it was just a text message. I didn’t even know my phone could GET text messages! It was very odd, and it just simply said “I love you.” I had NO idea who it was from, so I drove a while trying to figure out where it came from. However, my phone doesn’t tell me WHO, WHEN or anything about text messages. I was so pissed. I was 90% sure it wasn’t Andrew, because I had been with him all day, when would he have had a chance to do that. And plus I would hope that if/when that time were to come that he’s feels that way to say it, he would do it in a much more romantic way. But curiosity killed the cat, or in this case just made the cat look like I fool.

Anyways, after that I just drove home contemplating who could have sent that too me.

Friday his dad/family comes into town and he wants me to go to dinner with them if it’s alright with his dad. I’m very nervous about that, but I think it’ll be nice. I’m really excited for his graduation, but really sad at the same time, it just means that him leaving is coming so much quicker. I mean ever since I’ve met him he’s been talking about going to Cali for school, and how he’s going to be leaving. Now, that time is almost here, and we have to make the most of it all. I really wish that I could say screw it and take the whole summer off and just spend it with him, but alas we both have to work, and we’ll get the weekends together.

I miss him already, and he’s only 45 minutes away. I don’t know what I’ll do when he’s 20 hours away.

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