April 14, 2001

t shopping and i got some shorts and such stuff. i got a new pair of

boots too, so i gotta start breaking them in for the summer. it’s going to

take a while to break these in cause they are leather, so they take longer.

today is also danny and i’s (that doesn’t sound right) 6 month anniversary,

i want to call him sooo fucking bad. so last night though i had a really funky

dream. i was sitting in my dorm room, and all of a sudden tyler walzer (yes

the one from hs). was outside my window, now to start, my window is on the

3rd floor. so well, tyler just started like talking to me, and flirting with

me and such. (incase you didn’t know i _had_ a crush on him in hs). well he

we just talked trough the screen for a while and stuff, and then well we kissed,

and it was just so totally messed up cause it was like, wtf. but yeah, that’s

all i remember about that. but ok back to today, so today’s sucked pretty

much, it’s been really boring. i got up round 10, cause when i originally

got up at 7 my pu’s were yelling at my brother, so i was like, umm, beter

let that pass before i get up. so i did, and then i got up and came down stairs

and everyone was outside so i went out back and looked, and the fucking pond

was empty, i mean totaly fucking empty and they were all standing around it

and i was like what happened, cause i mean this pond isn’t small and it would

take alot to get all the water out of it. and my mom said in thie really annoying

voice “sleeping beauty wants to know what happened” and then my dad in his

asshole voice said “andy went swimming” and that’s all they said, so i said,

well if no one’s going to answer me i’ll just go back to bed, so i turned

around and started to walk back to the house and they just fuckinng screamed

at me. and it was like WTF, i asked a smiple goddamn fucking question can’t

you give me a simple fucking answer? so then we needed to get some shit so

we could refill it, cause there’s like this stuff you have to put in the water

to get rid of the shit the city puts in, so i was like well i’ll go get it,

so i left for like 4 hours. that was ok. lol. but then i got back and my dad

was like you want to go see “spy-kids” and i was like no, i don’t want to

see that movie, so then he was like, well “Chris doesn’t want to go to the

moies” and i said, “no i don’t want to see _that_ movie” and he fucking blew

up at me about that. i just want to fucking scream at him. but i know that

if i scream at him, he screams back louder, and bad stuff happens. so yeah.

i just fucking let it go, so we watched hollow man on PPV, it was a sucky

movie, not at all what i expected so then he blamed me for picking out a bad

movie, and i was like wtf, i didn’t have any idea what it was, and you all

agreed to it, so shut the hell up. damnit. and boy tomorrows going to be a

whole shit load of fun too, i can just see it, arg. i really hate holidays

with my family. i want to be with danny this weekend, damnit, it’s our 6 month

anniversary, i want to call him so fucking bad. i really really do. damnit

this really annoys me too everytime they get up i have to stopp writing cause

i don’t want them to see this, and then by the time they get back to thier

chairs i forget what i was writing about. i don’t really know how i lived

through my hs years in this house, now even a weekend here makes me go crazy.

i relaly don’t know. but on other things i’ve been thinking about maybe setting

up a panel disscussion at DSU. maybe like the week before finals or something,

i could get scott (the diversity guy), julie (a lesbian teacher), me and jason

(an openly gay student). and we could do like a Q&A thing. i mean, i don’t

think it would really jeporidze (sp) us, and i mean doing it at the end of

the semester it would give people the summer to think it over, and since scott

and julie work there, and julie’s out and has been there in madison for a

while, i mean there’s really no harm done if things go bad. it could only

help to inform the hicks that go to school there. i know the answers would

have to be pretty carefully worded, but i think the four of us on a panel

could pull it off. i’m going to suggest it to jason and julie when we get

back from holiday. oh on another topic i was going through folders like i

alwas do when i get home and found that my brother had taken some stuff out

of the trash that i had forgotten to delete, namely rants that i wrote last

time i was home, where danny was mentioned a bit and some other stuff, so

i don’t know what they know or anything else, i mean they havn’t brought it

up yet, and they havn’t said anything about the phone bill, which is surprosing,

but oh well, as long as tey keep quite it makes my life easy. i’m going to

go take a shower now. laters.

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