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Effort

You see….

In the 100+ dates I’ve had since I started this crusade, there’s been few boys to make it past date #1. But if they do… I put all my effort into them. I do everything I can to try and see where things will go.

So, I get involved.. Perhaps a little bit too emotionally very quickly. That’s why it hurts and bugs me when they don’t work out.

Yes, I’m going through a lot of boys, but this is a quest god-damnit!

I’m sick of being single, it’s been nearly 2 years now. And I want it to be over!

Jay said he’d call yesterday at 5pm, it’s 8:25am.. And still nothing. I called him at midnight last night… No answer. I left a message. “I’m begining to thing you just don’t want to talk to me”. Two days where he said he’d call, and nothing. I’m not contacting him… We’ll see if he ever calls me again. I’m doubtful… Where’s this “repsect” you talked of the other day Jay? Or how about the “regret” you had for not calling me the first time?? The only thing that should have stopped him from calling yesterday was an accident. Ugh!

I was sitting outside this morning drinking my coffee and a really cute boy said hello to me. He works in my building.

I hate having a good internal alarm… I went to bed at 3 this morning… My body woke me promptly at 5:10. I’m tired.. and very irritable.

I updated the BF application again… I added two questions (wierd fact, message morning/night) and changed one question debt/income to FICO score… Go check it out.

2 replies on “Effort”

Maybe you are trying too hard. Take it easy and relax a little bit. You have a lot to offer someone and that someone will come your way. It may just take time. And I know it’s easier said than done.

Yeah, but if I don’t go at it full blast right away, I feel like then things don’t work out because they aren’t seeing the real me. The caring, sweet side… I need to find some sort of middle ground.

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