My Life

“Happy” Thanksgiving

Fucking horoscopes:

It’s important to be with your family or your tribe today, for the feeling of being connected to community can bring you great satisfaction. It’s not that you need to be like everyone else; you just want to be able to partake in the sharing. Pay attention to your discomfort level, for if others draw you in too close, you may want to withdraw. Finding a comfortable place between isolation and assimilation may be difficult, but it will be well worth the trouble.

Yeah right… good thing I’m going to be sitting alone at home all day.

Had a horrible fight with andrew last night… And now I’m feeling more alone then ever.

I did however go out with this guy Michael, he was pretty nice. He called me last night and asked if I wanted to see a movie this weekend, so I’ll probably take him up on that.

“Happy” Thanksgiving everyone.


15 replies on ““Happy” Thanksgiving”

awww… *hug*


Go get yourself a bottle of rum and have yourself a wackey drunken


so really did miss you at the “family feast” this year. we had it at vintage park as GG just got home yestereday. Eveidently your favorite aunt got pissy because I made a comment when she arrived about bringing the “girls” so she left early and went home because some people did not think the girls needed to be there. was a small gathering, berdine and florence, GG, your family, Me, Belinda G&G, your favorite aunt and the girls. Raymond and Teresa arrived as we were leaving. Potatoes were lumpy and coversation sucked!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Hope this brightens your day

i think lots of people think the girls don’t need to be there.. no one else brings them, why should she! maybe if they were a little better trained and she weren’t so annoying! haha…

My potatoes came out fine. 😀 So you should have all come visited me!

Rebecca, Keira & I went to my parents this year. Doesn’t sound like we missed much (besides the noodles!).Advice about Andrew: stop talking to him. No e-mails, AIM, phone calls. You both need time to get your heads on straight. What you’re doing now is picking at an emotional scab, and it’ll never heal if you keep messing with it. Pick it enough & it may leave an emotional scar. Give yourself time away from his sphere of influence. Only in six months to a year without any contact can you truly appreciate what is going on around you.

That’s what I keep saying and trying to do… We did 3 months last year when he was living here and clearly that wasn’t enough! And then 3 months apart, but with e-mails when he was in the EU.

But if we do a year now, well this is the last year we’ll have living in the same damn state. I just don’t know what to do anymore.

The scar is already there, it hurts to think about him in any capactiy anymore…

The problem is that you *didn’t* do it the 3 months he was there. How many times did you talk on the phone? IM? E-mail or post comments to each other? Contact needs to be completely severed in order for the healing to begin. And no, you don’t have any scars–yet. Only when you start growing your fingernails to ridiculous lengths, collecting all of your feces in jars, and wandering your apartment in a dirty bathrobe having complete conversations with yourself will you actually be scarred.

More advice: delete him from your phone, block him on your IM, delete his e-mails before you read them. Swear off boys for awhile, at least until you find that someone special–and you’ll just *know* when you’ve met them, believe me. Stop trying to meet someone dateable. Go out, do things, meet people, and have fun without listening to your dick. You may be doing a lot of jerking off, but at least you know you won’t hurt yourself emotionally…physically, well, that depends on your technique… 🙂

A clean break from him will be good for both of you. You both need some time & perspective.

My Thanksgiving was worse than yours, I spent it sick in bed with an IV stuck in my wrist, too bad i couldnt taste the Turkey, stuffing, and mashed potatoes, that were going right to my blood stream. I guess they have left overs but that wont be the same. i am so glad to be up and out of bed now…and finally see some sunshine, what little there is. I am still a little sick thoughbut hope to talk to you later today…xoxoxo

Leper, thing is that during those three months he was here, we didn’t have any contact, I did delete him from my buddy list and my phone. The first week or so there were comments, etc on each others journals, but then we both stopped reading the others journal as well. So we did do it for at least 3 months… Obviously not long enough!

Honestly, I’m not looking for anyone to date right now.. I’d LIKE to date Blake, but we know that’s not going to happen any time soon, so I’m not concerned with that.. I’m looking for friends and that’s that… The problem is that all these boys around here are all, “Yeah, I wanna be just friends.” blah blah blah. And then you hang out with them and they are all over you trying to make out, or they suddenly want to date you. OR my biggest problem, they never talk to you again! haha.

And lastly, I already do a lot of jerking off! lol

PS. I hear you aren’t coming to christmas? WTF is up with that?!

Blake… Awww, poor you! I’m sorry. At least you are feeling better now and you had two cute boys to take care of you and family around! I’m sure you’re probably out shopping with those two hotties right now as it is… So have fun! talk to you later!

I am sorry to tell you Chris, but it is like that here in Iowa as well. People just wanta be friends but then it turns out they want a “fuck buddy”.

Whatever happen to just having friends.

Leper is giving some good advice.

Eh, i’ve had much fewer people in iowa turn into that then out here… But it’s true, what did happen to just having friends?

And yes, Leper is giving good advice, it’s just harder to follow through on it.

I didn’t say it was easy, just best for both of you. It takes willpower to not cave to your self-pity & call/write/e-mail/IM him. THIS GOES FOR ANDREW AS WELL! Maybe a year from now you two can be friends, but right now you’re poison for each other.

Were I in your position (and believe me, I have been), I’d not even give myself the option of dating. Wouldn’t even consider it. Any relationship you would have at this time would be a rebound one, and we all know how *those* end. Relax, give yourself time, continue jerking off, and do something else for awhile.

Yes, we are coming to Christmas, only I was told that it was Christmas Eve, not Christmas Day due to some family scheduling conflict. We’re driving down to Lenox the night of the 23rd, spending the night, doing the Christmas Eve thing, and then driving home & doing my family on Christmas Day. At least until someone changes the plan.

I completely agree Leper… 🙂

Yeah, I heard we are doing it on the Eve as well, and apparently my Family is going to my mom’s side on the day… Which is like a first in forever! but we are having it at the farm, which will require a whole post in and of itself to explain why that sucks ass!

Glad to hear you will be there though!

Just to clear a few things up, we only didnt talk for two months earlier this year, not three. That was enough time for me to get over things, and be ok with stuff.

We could be friends now if Chris didn’t treat me like I am supposed to be his boyfriend, because that isn’t how I’m going to act, and then it causes problems.

If you don’t wanna be friends, fine. But it would be nice of you to actually tell me.

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