I know what my problem is, it’s that I don’t understand how someone can love me. I know how I can love someone else. I’m in love. But I can’t comprehend in my mind how they can love me. I look at myself and see everything that’s wrong. I see all the flaws and I see how I think, I see the way I look every morning and I know how I live. I see all these things and think how horrible of a person I am, and I think to myself, how can they love someone like me? How can they look at me and say that they love me, spend every day with me and say that they like being around me. I lay in bed at night looking back on my day, thinking how boring it was, I think about how rutine it was. I say to myself everynight that I’m going to get out and do things, that I’m going to change my routine. I just don’t understand, and that’s what I need to change. I need to learn.
Christianity taught that men ought to be as chaste as pagans thought honest women ought to be; the contraceptive morality teaches that women need to be as little chaste as pagans thought men need be.