Single again and Boat Life

Single again… Kellie came to visit me in Annapolis and there were just a lot of little issues that I couldn’t deal with any more. Basically since Greece things have been kinda on an edge. I care about him but there was just too much animosity from all the arguing and other little things. I don’t really want to say much but I’m sad it’s over and based on how I feel overall, it was def the right decision for me. I wish him the best. I wish things had been different. But it just wasn’t the right time.

Boat life has been a lot of fucking work. Boat vendors are really really frustrating to me. No one can show up on time, no one can do the work they promise on time. Nothing happens quickly at all. IE I ordered a washer/dryer 8 weeks ago. They shipped me a fucking DISHWASHER. Now they have the washer/dryer but saying they cannot get to installation until next week. WTF. So annoying.

Astra is getting better at boat living. But she still hates when we start the engines. Will be really interesting to see what happens when we start to sail and get into some waves!

I question if this was the right thing to do every day, tbh. I am feeling more isolated already. I feel that there are people when I was in SF that I used to talk to every day that are now barely replying to me.

Charles sent me some songs the other day. They still brought tears to my eyes even though we’ve both prob played them 100’s of times over the course of our relationship and in the year since. What does it mean that a year later, he still makes me cry sometimes.

A pretty rough update

It’s been a while since I’ve blogged, to be honest it’s been hella busy and stressful with everything that’s going on.

Went to Greece and had a great time but Kellie and I fought a lot about stupid stuff. One day Kellie was sitting next to me and Charles was texting about Astra. Kellie saw and got up and walked away and went and sat on the other side of the boat. Clearly he was annoyed. He sat there and kinda pouted for hours. Finally we all went to bed and he just sat up there. We started texting and it was pretty nasty. I was hella annoyed that he acted kinda like a child in that situation. There were a few other times too where he was just being overly childish about things.

The trip overall was fun. But just the amount of arguing on the trip really pissed me off. We didn’t have sex once (we did however have a threesome, with some Mexican in Paris!).

Once we got back, it was just a whirlwind of packing and moving. We still didn’t have sex before I left. I was just too annoyed with him overall to want to have sex. Since I left, we haven’t fought but I have been just slightly annoyed with him. We’re going to see each other this weekend so let’s see how it goes.

Drove to Iowa, spent some time there. Things were fine. I was a bit annoyed with Randy and Zach, I texted them and asked if they were free one weekend. They replied that they were busy but never offered another day or followed up with a day that would work for them to meet up. So that was a bit of a let down. I just feel like when people do that, it means they aren’t really that into hanging out with you. I didn’t bother following up with them and neither of them have reached out since.

From there, drove to South Carolina with Dad…. We got HELLA lucky. We left the day before hurricane hit and got stuck on the freeway for about 6 hours just outside of Asheville. Thank GOD it was ONLY 6 hours. The whole time I was sitting there, I was so frustrated and pissed off that we were stuck, but TBH we got really lucky and I’m grateful that it was ONLY 6 hours in hindsight. I also feel like we got lucky that we stopped because after we drove through the areas that were closed, there were trees down everywhere, cars blown off the road, etc. Part of the interstate we had passed by got completely washed out.

Dad was here in SC with me for a week. I’m very grateful for his help but it’s a bit embarrassing sometimes the way he interacts with people. IE we went to a restaurant and this young girl was the host… She told us it was a 90 minute wait and my dad said something (I forget) and then put his hand on her shoulder. and I just wanted to be like “Dad, you cannot TOUCH people like that”.. Another night we went to this gas station to get ice cream. There was a young girl working the register by herself and dad said to her “here by yourself tonight”. And again, I just wanted to yell. “DAD, You cannot say stuff like that”. He just says very inappropriate stuff, but I know he thinks he’s just being friendly/joking/etc and he doesn’t see the harm in it.

Anyway, while he was here we did a lot of projects on the boat. The biggest one was installing the water maker. I had got a quote for installing it for $5,000. I was like, no way am I gonna spend that much. But TBH, I sort of wished we had spent that money now. LOL. It was frustrating AF. We spent probably 3 days JUST trying to decide where to put it… We made 2-3 trips to various stores every day to buy parts/etc for it. There were probably two times I wanted to just throw the fucking thing in the water and say FUCK IT. But now it’s installed, I’m mostly happy with it. So that’s good. This boat life though is costing me a LOT more then I expected, mostly cause I’m just trying to outfit the boat, buying lots of random stuff, paddle boards, scooters, etc. Hopefully once I get off the dock it’ll be much cheaper.

Speaking of getting off the dock. Basically leave in less than a month. And I have NO CLUE where I am going. Some people say go to the north of the Bahamas to start, other people say go to the south to start. I just don’t know what to do! There’s too many options, too much information. People say “don’t have a plan” but I at least have to have a general idea of where to go. I dunno. I’m just getting a bit nervous about it all and going alone, etc.

New Boat and a Hurricane

Posting a public post on this topics…

I finally closed on a boat, a 2023 Fountaine Pajot ISLA 40. The whole thing has been insanely stressful and I’ve questioned my decision multiple times already. But I’m strong and it’s going to be a story to tell in a few years. No matter how it goes.

The whole sales process was way more stressful than I expected. There’s a lot more to buying a boat then buying a house. IE picking a home port, getting insurance, finding a marina to dock it at. I also found that people in the industry suck at replying back to you. You really have to hound them, which I’m not good at. I am someone who calls once then waits for you to call back (probably one reason why my dating life always sucked). So you’d call and wait and wait and wait, then not get an answer.

Once we closed, I hired some guys that were highly recommended to install solar on the boat. They had massive attitudes and really pissed me off. I’m not happy with the quality of the work they did.

THEN, we took the boat over to get the bottom cleaned and the fucking propellers fell off, so there was a $7k unexpected expense right out of the door.

THEN!!! A fucking hurricane started forming and heading right for where the boat was stored. I needed to move the boat out of Florida anyway because I didn’t pay FL taxes we only had so long to keep it there. So I hired these (again, highly recommended) captains to help me move the boat. They arrived and basically got on board and were like “let’s go”. So we left, I was insanely stressed. I felt like nothing was ready, I wanted to have another day to get the boat cleaned up and buy some spares, etc. But we left at 10pm. The trip itself went well, they didn’t sail which was annoying but they just wanted to get to our destination as fast as possible. We hung out, they fished. I tried to learn as much as I could about the boat. Again, VERY stressful, just so many things to learn and understand.

On day two, they said something about where we were going, and I was like: “wait, what, that’s NOT where we are going.” SO THEN, I had to stress and find a new place to store the boat. THANK GOD I had starlink and was able to find something in Charleston, SC.

We arrived in Charleston Saturday night and they tied the boat up and just spilt. Overall, the guys did their job, they got the boat from point A to B. But I wasn’t very happy with them. My broker called and chatted and he asked me more about the boat, the trip, etc then my own parents did. Which was a bit frustrating.

Monday, a fucking hurricane hits Charleston. Again, I was stresssssed. I’ve owned the boat for a week. I just moved it out of a hurricane and now that hurricane we had been avoiding is hitting right where we were. WTF why is Mother Nature putting me through this stress so early. Most people get to enjoy the boat, do some fun stuff and then eventually get themselves into these situations. But not me, FIRST WEEK get the hardest shit.

I got a hotel and Tuesday morning I went to check the boat, one of the lines had snapped. I ran into a guy on the docks and he was able to drive to the marina store and get more lines then come back and help me tie up. Thank god or him.

I have realized that people in this industry, even though they SUCK at replying to you or follow through. They are amazing at helping out, giving advise, etc. IT’s been so nice how helpful for the most part people are.

But, I was def having a melt down. I have been nearly in tears a few times already with this whole situation. I’ve been questioning myself, is this the right thing to do, what about astra, is she going to be happy. Am _I_ going to be happy. Thankfully, my friends have been amazing support. Charles has been more supportive and encouraging than I’d have ever expected.

I have just over one month left in my apartment. Really, only 20ish days because we leave for Greece. I have so much to do between now and then. So much more to learn and so many lessons to come.

I’ll admit. I’m scared, but excited to try this adventure.