And I’m at the airport on my way to Galapagos. This is gonna be an exciting trip but I sure wish that Charlie was coming with me.
However, it will be great to be away from him for a bit as well.
We’ve spent every single day together since I got back from Christmas. Just the time he’s at work and one day where he went and spent the day with Eric..
Things are going great. I am of Course anxious about everything and feel clingy sometimes. I wish he would express more of his feelings.
I hate still seeing fuck Eric’s name pop up on the screen. Charles told me that I should be the bigger man and reach out to Eric to kick things off with him. I told Calvin and he said no! I Told Charlie a few days later that I think he needs to be the one to start things. The night the two of them hung out they talked about me and hanging out again. Eric says he’s not ready apparently.
The biggest thing I don’t like about Charlie is that I feel he just doesn’t express interest in things. Like today was our last day together before my birthday and trip. If he had been the one leaving, I would have planned a day together. Some nice activity, dinner somewhere. etc. He didn’t plan anything.
I ask him probing questions like “where would you want our first interatnaion trip together to be”. But he never asks me questions like that.
I’ve noticed too that he’s been less “lovey” via text. Less emoticons, stuff like that. I brought it up with him the other day and we got into a bit of an argument. He said that he though things like “going to the grocery store together” were advancing the relationship. I guess so, but why does that mean you have to stop sending kissy face?
I dunno. maybe I’m just fucking childish about shit like this. I want him to send me kissy faces. I want him to say he misses me. I want him to come and hug and kiss me.
I feel like I’m the one who’s always expressing these things now.
He dropped me off at the airport today and I felt like he was being a bit emotional. I felt like he was sad to see me go. But he didn’t express it at all. We hugged, kissed goodbye, hugged some more. And then left.
I guess I”m probably just being too emotional and over thinking it. I expect too much.
He does some super cute stuff, we have good times together. We hold hands in the car, we cuddle all night long. But it’s just never enough for me. What is enough!