My Life

Holiday Depression

Man, it’s been a tough week or two. I have been in NC this past week shutting down our plant out there. Honestly it was super depressing to see this HUGE plant that has been buzzing with activity and machines running and people all over it to be just dead silent. Very eerie to be there and walking around alone, cleaning up desktops, etc. It really was like everyone just disappeared one day and walked out. There were still papers everywhere, trash in the trash cans, etc.

I don’t know what it is but traveling just makes me really depressed and emotional anyway and then with the emotions of closing that plant down it really got to me.

It also seems that EVERYONE is getting into relationships now and yet here I am still single AF. Even Gym Husband has a BF now!! WTF.

Pasta randomly messaged me out of no where a few days ago. I haven’t replied yet and I don’t know if I will or not.

Leaving for Iowa in a few days for christmas. I am going to drive.

Honestly, when I started this post I was going to write about a lot of stuff…. But now I just don’t feel like it.

My Life

Costa Rica and White Privilege

So much to talk about here and not really sure where to start…

Been in Costa Rica for the past week and it’s been a great trip although I’ve been really lonely and sad for most of it. Apple was supposed to come but he got rejected at the boarder (honestly, not sure I believe that story). So it’s been just me, Hut, Sean and Polly. The same group as Japan. It’s been really making me miss Yasuo (from Japan!). The trip overall has been good but it’s been raining a lot. We did some zip lining, some amazing hot springs, lots of hiking (and STAIRS) and that’s basically it. Today is the last full day and then back to reality.

It’s been sad because I hate being single on trips. I hate that I have this cute, romantic hotel room. I hate that we go to these amazing hot springs that would be great to cuddle and make out in. Etc etc. I should have been married by now but I fucked it up and I’m going to regret it forever.

Darin and I got into a huge discussion about White Privilege. It honestly really pissed me off. I sent him this funny picture of a bunch of dudes around a thanksgiving table all dressed exactly a like and he started off with this comment about how “obviously they don’t want to include other races”. First off you cannot tell that just by ONE PICTURE. He is being just as racist by ASSUMING that they excluded other races. There’s many reasons it could have been all white. and then he made this comment about how they all have white privilege, blah blah blah. And honestly I’m getting sick of this kind of shit. Everyone bashes white people/guys for being racist and having white privilege. But then they are hypocrites. It’s NOT ok for a white guy to say “No Asains” or “No blacks” but it’s totally cool for an asian guy to say “No whites” or a black guy to say “no whites”. NO, it shouldn’t be! It goes both ways. Just really frustrates me. There’s way more too it but honestly I just don’t want to get into it here.

Tony messaged me randomly the other day and said “I really enjoyed my trip to CA, want to do it again soon” So that made me feel really good 🙂

There’s other stuff to talk about but I just don’t know and don’t feel like it at the moment. Off to go enjoy the last day in Costa Rica. See you soon boys.

My Life

Guys in Relationships

Hmm. Not really sure where to start. I’ve started doing Orange Theory which has been good. I’ve been going to the 6:15am Class so it feels good to be up and get that done before work. I haven’t seen any changes physically but I’m pretty sure things are changing. I’m hoping one day I’ll wake up and be like, WWHO IS THAT!!! LOL. When I started a few weeks ago I could barely run. Yesterday I did a full 12 minutes non-stop running at 12 min mile pace. WHich is pretty damn good improvement I think! I’ve also been trying to do weights on my off days but those are harder to actually get up and do. This morning I skipped it.

My date a few weekends ago was nice. He’s a nice guy but just not something we have a lot in common I guess. I’ve been matching with tons of people recently but nothing really happening from it. Met two REALLY cute guys who I enjoy talking too, only to find out they are in relationships. Like WTF are you doing on Tinder if you’re in a relationship! Met some other guys who I think are super cute and would love to go on dates with but nada is happening. Supposed to have this date on Friday with this guy but he seems a bit flakey. Trying to find someone to have a date with Saturday as well but I don’t know if that’ll happen or not.

This past weekend I just kinda spent it at home alone. Did some stuff around the house and just relaxed which was actually pretty nice.

Yesterday the roommate told me he is moving out. I sort of want to just rent this house and find something smaller. But I’m looking and you can get like a 2bd house for the same price I’m paying for my mortgage!! Just stupid. I guess if I’m going to move, I’ll have to wait and move out of the state.

The next couple months are going to be insane. Costa Rica, Forest City, Iowa trips all coming up.

Darin spent the night a few weekends ago. We ended up having a threesome with this guy. It was pretty hot but the whole time i Just wanted to make out with him and fuck him. I wish he liked cuddling more too.

I’ve been having these crazy up and down days. Yesterday was a huge high and today seems really low.

The court case for the guy who robbed us is STILL dragging out. I just got an update from the DA. She’s trying to get him to plea out to 16 years. But he’s refusing that offer. I want this mother fucker in prison for the rest of his life.

I’m just getting so sick of all these dates and nothing happening. AGain. Everyone I know is in a fucking relationship, moving in together, etc etc and etc. ANd here I am fucking single AF.

Darin and I got to talking about Calvin the other day too while he was over and he was even telling me how I fucked up and let the best one go. Yeah. Thanks for reminding me Darin.

My Life

Roadtrip to WA.

This past weekend I did a road trip up to Kennewick to pick up the Torino. I’ve been wanting to get up there for a while and kept putting it off and putting it off. I’m glad I finally made it up there.

The drive up was nice. I stopped in Klamath Falls, OR on the way up and spent the night. Arrived in Kennewick around noon on Friday, ate lunch at my FAVORITE place (Country Merch) and then went over to the storage units where the cars were at. On the way up to Kennewick this guy called me asking to look at the car so he met me there. I opened up the storage unit and the car cover was FILTHY. I’m so glad I bought that and put it on there. The guy spent like 30 minutes looking over the car and then offered me $21k. I said no way.

So I spent the afternoon getting it started up. It just needed some gas and a little love and she started right up!!

Went over to the bronco and she was completely dead. Hooked up the jumper cables to it and the starter was just making this buzzing sound. I fucked around with it a bit more and nothing happened so I gave up for the night and just went to get dinner.

Ate dinner at Porters BBQ. So yum but so expensive then went to the hotel room and met up with my favorite fuck buddy ever. This hot twinky latin boy with the fattest cock. omg. So delicious. After that I met up with Jose and we just hung out and chatted.

Saturday I got up early and went over and started working on the bronco more. Decided to just get a new battery and put that in and he FINALLY turned over but now he was leaking gas everywhere! Looked to me like the rubber hose was busted so I went and bought a new one, replaced it and he started right up! But there was still gas leaking everywhere! 🙁 I was really hoping to get him out and drive him round a bit. But that didn’t happen. Just shut the door and went to get the trailer. Loaded up the Torino and then booked it back to Vallejo. The drive was completely uneventful.

Got home and so glad that I came home on Saturday because Sunday was a nightmare in Vallejo. The wind was INSANE, fires everywhere and power went out.

Darin and his BF broke up, I feel bad for him because it sort of just came out of no where.

I am going to be in the city this weekend on a date and I texted Bathhouse BF. He replied and said he would love to meet but he can’t host… So I’m betting he has a BF/Husband! Ugh. Annnoyyyinnnggg.

I had some weird feelings being back in kennewick. On one hand I really miss that place. Everything was so nice and clean and safe. They have places I really loved (the river, etc). Everyone is so friendly. etc. But at the same time, I just couldn’t WAIT to get out of there. I hate how conservative it is, I hate how all the people on grindr are the same as they were 2 years ago. Etc.

My Life

Bathhouse BF

This past weekend Tony came to visit. I haven’t seen him in almost 10 years. Honestly I was very nervous about him coming because I hadn’t seen him in so long and also because I wasn’t sure what all to do with him. I wanted to make sure he had a great time but I also didn’t know exactly what all to do with him.

He arrived Friday and I picked him up at the airport we went out to lunch somewhere and then went home. Showed him around down town Benicia, Vallejo and then did a quick hike. That evening we went out to the GAY BAR in Vallejo. Yes, there’s actually a fucking GAY BAR. We arrived and it’s this ghetto little place. Exactly what I expected to be honest. Everyone seemed to know each other. The three of us (my roommate went with) sat down at the bar and the bar owner proceeded to stand RIGHT NEXT to us, playing with glasses and ignored us totally. Finally after what seemed like 30 awkward minutes the other bar tender finally asked us what we wanted to drink. This place is clearly just for the regulars and not for newbies.

We had our drinks and just hung out chatting. Talked to some of the other patrons and had a good time. Went home around 1am.

Saturday we were both up pretty early and decided to go kayaking in Oakland. Drove down there and went to the rental store. WE walked in and there was this old guy and a super hot young guy behind the counter. We tell them we want to rent a kayak and the old guy starts on this “oh man the weather is so bad, the wind is high blah blah blah” So he was basically scaring us out of going! Tony and I are both pretty good kayakers, so we go out and look at the water and it’s FINE. Go back in and rent the kayaks. Spent about 2 hours doing that which was super fun!

After Kayaking we went to lunch AT POPEYES, his request. Then Costco (his request) and then went home. Got back home about 5pm and he went to take a nap while I walked the dog. He finally woke up around 7pm and we went out to dinner then decided to go to the bathhouse for the evening.

WARNING::::: NSFW content below.

So usually when I go to the bathhouse it’s a pretty boring affair. I walk around for HOURS then finally settle on some OKish looking guy and we just suck each other off. Well this trip was TOTALLY DIFFERENT. So many hot guys there, it wasn’t more than 10 minutes and I was sitting in the steam room and this hot guy sits down next to me and we start jerking each other then he sucks me for a while… I eventually get up and walk away cause I didn’t want to peak right there! Walk around for a while and then back in the steam room. This time this super cute Indian guy comes up to me and I suck him off for a while. While I’m doing that this other guy sits next to me and starts blowing me!! After a bit we all sort of switch around and there’s this group of guys watching us, I got a bit freaked out and got up and left.

After a bit more I see this cute twinky Korean boy. He blows me for a while in the glory holes. But eventually I just left him.

Was sitting in the hot tub and saw this SUPER HOT guy go into the steam room. I figured there was no way I could get anything with him but at least I could go watch him get blown or something. So I go into there and sit down on the bench and he of course has guys all over him. Watch him for a bit and then I’m not really sure what happens but suddenly he’s sitting next to me on the bench and we’re making out. After a while we start blowing each other and then he asks me if I have a room. I tell him no, I’m on the waiting list, he is too. So we go to the glory-hole rooms and we both squeeze into one. More making out, BJ’s, etc. Eventually he starts banging me. After a while he’s like “want to come back to my house”.. .UGH YES!!!! But sadly I was there with Tony and couldn’t bail on him. So I ask him if he wants to come back to mine?? He says he can’t cause he has a dog to go home too. 🙁 So we make out a little longer and then decide to just go our own ways. As we’re leaving the booth, I notice my name on the screen saying my room is ready!!!

So we take it to the room, lots more making out, caressing his beautiful body, flip-fucking, etc. After we both came we laid there cuddling for a while and then we both needed to go. I asked him for his number and said, “no pressure, if you’re just gonna ghost don’t give it to me” he said something along the lines of, “no, i’d like to see you again” and gave me his number. We left the room and went our own ways. I saw him in the hot tub while I was showering and waved goodbye and Tony and I left to go home.

On the way home, bathhouse boy was texting me a bit. Tony said to leave him until monday and then text him again. So on Monday I texted him, he took 12 hours to reply. I messaged him back and no reply since then. 🙁 So sad. I’d really love to see him again and see if we have any passion outside of the bathhouse.. My luck is he’s already married. Next time I’m in his area, I’ll text and see if he wants to meet up.

Sunday Tony and I went to SF and just walked around. Met up with Victor for a while. Drove Tony to the airport and went home.

Lots of other stuff going on. Mostly with Apple but not interested in writing about it.

I started doing Orange Theory and have been enjoying it. But the running is just so hard!!!