Going back Private

It’s been a long time since I had written publicly but earlier this year I decided to go public with my blog again.

I forgot how much drama it can cause, so I have decided to go back to privately posting.

I will continue to post publicly about some big things in my life. But for the most part this will now be a private blog, again.

Thanks!

Guys in Relationships

Hmm. Not really sure where to start. I’ve started doing Orange Theory which has been good. I’ve been going to the 6:15am Class so it feels good to be up and get that done before work. I haven’t seen any changes physically but I’m pretty sure things are changing. I’m hoping one day I’ll wake up and be like, WWHO IS THAT!!! LOL. When I started a few weeks ago I could barely run. Yesterday I did a full 12 minutes non-stop running at 12 min mile pace. WHich is pretty damn good improvement I think! I’ve also been trying to do weights on my off days but those are harder to actually get up and do. This morning I skipped it.

My date a few weekends ago was nice. He’s a nice guy but just not something we have a lot in common I guess. I’ve been matching with tons of people recently but nothing really happening from it. Met two REALLY cute guys who I enjoy talking too, only to find out they are in relationships. Like WTF are you doing on Tinder if you’re in a relationship! Met some other guys who I think are super cute and would love to go on dates with but nada is happening. Supposed to have this date on Friday with this guy but he seems a bit flakey. Trying to find someone to have a date with Saturday as well but I don’t know if that’ll happen or not.

This past weekend I just kinda spent it at home alone. Did some stuff around the house and just relaxed which was actually pretty nice.

Yesterday the roommate told me he is moving out. I sort of want to just rent this house and find something smaller. But I’m looking and you can get like a 2bd house for the same price I’m paying for my mortgage!! Just stupid. I guess if I’m going to move, I’ll have to wait and move out of the state.

The next couple months are going to be insane. Costa Rica, Forest City, Iowa trips all coming up.

Darin spent the night a few weekends ago. We ended up having a threesome with this guy. It was pretty hot but the whole time i Just wanted to make out with him and fuck him. I wish he liked cuddling more too.

I’ve been having these crazy up and down days. Yesterday was a huge high and today seems really low.

The court case for the guy who robbed us is STILL dragging out. I just got an update from the DA. She’s trying to get him to plea out to 16 years. But he’s refusing that offer. I want this mother fucker in prison for the rest of his life.

I’m just getting so sick of all these dates and nothing happening. AGain. Everyone I know is in a fucking relationship, moving in together, etc etc and etc. ANd here I am fucking single AF.

Darin and I got to talking about Calvin the other day too while he was over and he was even telling me how I fucked up and let the best one go. Yeah. Thanks for reminding me Darin.

Roadtrip to WA.

This past weekend I did a road trip up to Kennewick to pick up the Torino. I’ve been wanting to get up there for a while and kept putting it off and putting it off. I’m glad I finally made it up there.

The drive up was nice. I stopped in Klamath Falls, OR on the way up and spent the night. Arrived in Kennewick around noon on Friday, ate lunch at my FAVORITE place (Country Merch) and then went over to the storage units where the cars were at. On the way up to Kennewick this guy called me asking to look at the car so he met me there. I opened up the storage unit and the car cover was FILTHY. I’m so glad I bought that and put it on there. The guy spent like 30 minutes looking over the car and then offered me $21k. I said no way.

So I spent the afternoon getting it started up. It just needed some gas and a little love and she started right up!!

Went over to the bronco and she was completely dead. Hooked up the jumper cables to it and the starter was just making this buzzing sound. I fucked around with it a bit more and nothing happened so I gave up for the night and just went to get dinner.

Ate dinner at Porters BBQ. So yum but so expensive then went to the hotel room and met up with my favorite fuck buddy ever. This hot twinky latin boy with the fattest cock. omg. So delicious. After that I met up with Jose and we just hung out and chatted.

Saturday I got up early and went over and started working on the bronco more. Decided to just get a new battery and put that in and he FINALLY turned over but now he was leaking gas everywhere! Looked to me like the rubber hose was busted so I went and bought a new one, replaced it and he started right up! But there was still gas leaking everywhere! 🙁 I was really hoping to get him out and drive him round a bit. But that didn’t happen. Just shut the door and went to get the trailer. Loaded up the Torino and then booked it back to Vallejo. The drive was completely uneventful.

Got home and so glad that I came home on Saturday because Sunday was a nightmare in Vallejo. The wind was INSANE, fires everywhere and power went out.

Darin and his BF broke up, I feel bad for him because it sort of just came out of no where.

I am going to be in the city this weekend on a date and I texted Bathhouse BF. He replied and said he would love to meet but he can’t host… So I’m betting he has a BF/Husband! Ugh. Annnoyyyinnnggg.

I had some weird feelings being back in kennewick. On one hand I really miss that place. Everything was so nice and clean and safe. They have places I really loved (the river, etc). Everyone is so friendly. etc. But at the same time, I just couldn’t WAIT to get out of there. I hate how conservative it is, I hate how all the people on grindr are the same as they were 2 years ago. Etc.

Bathhouse BF

This past weekend Tony came to visit. I haven’t seen him in almost 10 years. Honestly I was very nervous about him coming because I hadn’t seen him in so long and also because I wasn’t sure what all to do with him. I wanted to make sure he had a great time but I also didn’t know exactly what all to do with him.

He arrived Friday and I picked him up at the airport we went out to lunch somewhere and then went home. Showed him around down town Benicia, Vallejo and then did a quick hike. That evening we went out to the GAY BAR in Vallejo. Yes, there’s actually a fucking GAY BAR. We arrived and it’s this ghetto little place. Exactly what I expected to be honest. Everyone seemed to know each other. The three of us (my roommate went with) sat down at the bar and the bar owner proceeded to stand RIGHT NEXT to us, playing with glasses and ignored us totally. Finally after what seemed like 30 awkward minutes the other bar tender finally asked us what we wanted to drink. This place is clearly just for the regulars and not for newbies.

We had our drinks and just hung out chatting. Talked to some of the other patrons and had a good time. Went home around 1am.

Saturday we were both up pretty early and decided to go kayaking in Oakland. Drove down there and went to the rental store. WE walked in and there was this old guy and a super hot young guy behind the counter. We tell them we want to rent a kayak and the old guy starts on this “oh man the weather is so bad, the wind is high blah blah blah” So he was basically scaring us out of going! Tony and I are both pretty good kayakers, so we go out and look at the water and it’s FINE. Go back in and rent the kayaks. Spent about 2 hours doing that which was super fun!

After Kayaking we went to lunch AT POPEYES, his request. Then Costco (his request) and then went home. Got back home about 5pm and he went to take a nap while I walked the dog. He finally woke up around 7pm and we went out to dinner then decided to go to the bathhouse for the evening.

WARNING::::: NSFW content below.

So usually when I go to the bathhouse it’s a pretty boring affair. I walk around for HOURS then finally settle on some OKish looking guy and we just suck each other off. Well this trip was TOTALLY DIFFERENT. So many hot guys there, it wasn’t more than 10 minutes and I was sitting in the steam room and this hot guy sits down next to me and we start jerking each other then he sucks me for a while… I eventually get up and walk away cause I didn’t want to peak right there! Walk around for a while and then back in the steam room. This time this super cute Indian guy comes up to me and I suck him off for a while. While I’m doing that this other guy sits next to me and starts blowing me!! After a bit we all sort of switch around and there’s this group of guys watching us, I got a bit freaked out and got up and left.

After a bit more I see this cute twinky Korean boy. He blows me for a while in the glory holes. But eventually I just left him.

Was sitting in the hot tub and saw this SUPER HOT guy go into the steam room. I figured there was no way I could get anything with him but at least I could go watch him get blown or something. So I go into there and sit down on the bench and he of course has guys all over him. Watch him for a bit and then I’m not really sure what happens but suddenly he’s sitting next to me on the bench and we’re making out. After a while we start blowing each other and then he asks me if I have a room. I tell him no, I’m on the waiting list, he is too. So we go to the glory-hole rooms and we both squeeze into one. More making out, BJ’s, etc. Eventually he starts banging me. After a while he’s like “want to come back to my house”.. .UGH YES!!!! But sadly I was there with Tony and couldn’t bail on him. So I ask him if he wants to come back to mine?? He says he can’t cause he has a dog to go home too. 🙁 So we make out a little longer and then decide to just go our own ways. As we’re leaving the booth, I notice my name on the screen saying my room is ready!!!

So we take it to the room, lots more making out, caressing his beautiful body, flip-fucking, etc. After we both came we laid there cuddling for a while and then we both needed to go. I asked him for his number and said, “no pressure, if you’re just gonna ghost don’t give it to me” he said something along the lines of, “no, i’d like to see you again” and gave me his number. We left the room and went our own ways. I saw him in the hot tub while I was showering and waved goodbye and Tony and I left to go home.

On the way home, bathhouse boy was texting me a bit. Tony said to leave him until monday and then text him again. So on Monday I texted him, he took 12 hours to reply. I messaged him back and no reply since then. 🙁 So sad. I’d really love to see him again and see if we have any passion outside of the bathhouse.. My luck is he’s already married. Next time I’m in his area, I’ll text and see if he wants to meet up.

Sunday Tony and I went to SF and just walked around. Met up with Victor for a while. Drove Tony to the airport and went home.

Lots of other stuff going on. Mostly with Apple but not interested in writing about it.

I started doing Orange Theory and have been enjoying it. But the running is just so hard!!!

Folsom!

I went to Folsom! So crazy, right.

So Apple came up Friday evening and we hung out. We were supposed to go camping but the campground got closed due to snow. 🙁 Saturday we left home and went to the Mr. S Leather party. We met my friend Victor before hand which I thought would be good cause then that way we would have someone who’s a little more comfortable in those situations to anchor us. It didn’t really help. Apple was like super paronoid or something I dunno he was being weird. We didn’t stay long which was sad and just left and walked around the city then went home.

I’m not exactly sure what happened but things went down hill and we got into an argument and he just went him. Honestly it was a bit brash on his part to just leave but whatever.

Sunday I got up and went to meet Darin in the city. WE hung out at Dolores park for a bit. He was with one of his other friends. So it was nice to hang out with them. Got lunch then walked through the fair. SO MANY HOT GUYS.

This is where my depression and anxiety kicks in though. 🙁 I wish I was way more comfortable talking to these guys, going up to them and dancing with them, etc. Or even just being shirtless. Darin was shirtless the whole time. But I just couldn’t bring myself to do it. I saw a bunch of people there that I had known and talked to one or two but skipped most of them because I was anxious.

We went into this one bar and it was just SUPER DUPER packed. as we were walking through I made eye with this hot asian guy. We basically had a whole gay relationship in like the 5 minutes we passed each other. I really really wish I had actually talked to him.

Nothing much else going on. The costa rica trip is coming up quick. Which I’m excited about.

Haven’t had any dates recently. Been chatting with boys but nothing happening there.

I really need to get up to WA and get my car.

Selling my trailers to try and get new ones.

Blah blah blah.

Parents Visit

So I haven’t updated in a while. My parents were here and I have just been so fucking busy with them.

It was a nice visit. I took the whole week off, we built a deck which only took two days which I was super surprised by. Did some other stuff in the yard. I’m really happy with how the outside is coming out. Just need to figure out what to do with the front yard part. I didn’t want grass but when mom and I went to go look at plants it was going to be over $3,000!!!

TOok them to this exotic car driving thing in Napa on Friday. It was fun and the guy running it had a FINE ASS! Omg.

While the parents were here my aunt fell down and broke her knee and wrist at work. Now she’s always been a bit weird. She bought a house in 1999. The first couple years we would all go over sometimes, but after a while she stopped inviting people over. Almost no one has been in her house in maybe 10-15 years. Well she was in the hospital and needed someone to go take care of her dogs. So my other aunt went over there and the house is a MAJOR HOARDER situation. Trash everywhere. The pictures my dad has sent are so disgusting. Honestly, I think it stems back to my grandpa dying. TO me that seems like about the time she stopped having people over. I think she took it the hardest TBH and has just gone downhill since then. It’s sad to see…

In other news, I haven’t seen Apple in like a month. He is coming this weekend. We were supposed to go camping but they closed the campsite due to snow! Can you believe that? A week ago it was 100F here and now this campsite is closed due to snow!! I’m a bit nervous to see him. It’s how I am with anyone really, I get super nervous meeting people cause I am always concerned it won’t go well, or I’ll be boring or whatever. I dunno. same with my Psychologist or ZenDesk.

Speaking of ZenDesk, I met him for dinner the other night. It was fun but agian, I always get nervous that I am being boring or something.

Work has been OK. Nothing super exciting going on really.

We’re going to FOlsom this weekend and I’m super nervous!!!